Turtle Shank

A plastic single use straw, that ultimately ends up in a turtle's nose.

Me: No turtle shank in my drink, please.

Bar Tender: What's that?
Me: A straw.
Bar Tender: Ohhh. Got it.

by C.B. #99 December 31, 2018

Faggot Turtle

a gay turtle, (homosexual). very very VERY homo turtle that is a turtle. preferably gay and a turtle. (use this insult to destroy a gay turtle)

faggot turtle has joined your lobby

by Faggot Turtle December 10, 2020

Turtle-Move

A gutsy attempt at completing some ill-advised feat of physical dexterity. While the attempt will most likely ultimately end in complete and utter failure (with the participant on his/her back, feet and arms in the air, like a TURTLE turned upside down), the fact that the feat was attempted in the first place will be celebrated.

What makes it a TURTLE-MOVE is an extremely low chance of success and an almost assuredly high rate of personal injury.

"Man.... that attempted 180 on the tightrope was a real TURTLE-MOVE!"

Can also be used as a warning to others - "Be careful out there.... no TURTLE-MOVES"

by 71spud August 6, 2009

Post-turtle

*Australian definitive example.

Post-turtle

While stitching up the hand of a 75 year old Queensland farmer, who got cut on a gate while working cattle, the rural doctor struck up a conversation with the old man. Eventually the topic got around to Kevin-07 and his appointment to Prime Minister of Australia.

“Well, ya know,” drawled the old farmer, “this Rudd fella is what they call a fencepost turtle.”

Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a fencepost turtle was.

The old farmer said, “when you’re driving along a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that’s called a fencepost turtle.”

The old farmer saw a puzzled look on the doctor’s face, so he continued to explain,

“You know he didn’t get up there by himself, he definitely doesn’t belong up there, he doesn’t know what to do while he is up there, and you just gotta wonder what kind of dill put him up there in the first place!

by Tallara June 30, 2008

Velvet turtle

A masturbation device, home made or store bought

Hugo offered to hold my velvet turtle while I break it in.

by Moe976 November 18, 2009

turtle head

The tip of a turd that has opened your asshole just enough to peek out at the world.

I'm squeezing as hard as I can to hold it in, but I got a turtle head poking out.

by Mike April 12, 2004

Stink the turtle

A game in which people get under the covers and fart. Last person to poke their head out wins.

We ate some chili then had an epic game of stink the turtle.

by Djprecio October 14, 2009