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Jesus Chirst

Jesus Chirst, not to be confused with Jesus Christ, is what atheists believe in.
by Delerium_22 November 6, 2025
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Jesus Christ

Jesus' full name is Jesus Christ.
Jesus Christ is the son of God.

He died on the cross for each and every one of us. He died to forgive all of everyones sins, and he loves us all, and his love cannot be earned. He loves us unconditionally, and he is the light of this world.

You cannot earn your way into Heaven, you need to follow Jesus, forgive everyone else (including yourself), and believe in him.

God loves you, and he WILL forgive you if you come to him.

Don't believe the Devils lies.
by Black Cat - 5000 December 19, 2025
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Jesus Christ

Jesus Christ is a man with *Infinite Aura* and *Insane knowledge* (literally omniscient) also a *great guy* who would *help anyone* as is *everyones true answer to all their problems* (John 14:6) and a *Leader* often depicted as a *King of Kings* he also *saved the entirety of humanity*
by a.basra386 January 1, 2026
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Jesus Shit

After defecating, when one goes to wipe with toilet paper and discovers there is no feces to clean. Of all his numerous amazing feats & miracles, we can assume wipe-less bathroom sessions was among them. This act can also be called a "Holy Shit".
Wow, I just took the most amazing "Jesus Shit". What a way to start the day!
by MLS17 January 15, 2026
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semi-jesus

Some random from an IRC channel. Doesn't realise that this site was so last year :)
by Anonymous July 7, 2003
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Action Jesus

"Action Jesus just save a baby from a crocodile and a flaming puppy, all with his handgun"
"John Mclane<Action Jesus
by bhkbligligfiycdcfgvbhkj October 20, 2008
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Screaming Jesus

A FICTIONAL sexual "maneuver" that you would apply to a person you don't particularly like (or in some cases- hate), but still want to have sexual intercourse because they are extremely hot.

It is a maneuver specifically made up for fantasy purposes only- as the other person would die. It involves you nailing the A-hole/ Bitch to a cross, and then nailing him/ her (with consent).
Paul: "Damn, Bob's sister is a total Bitch. Did you hear what she said?"
Tom: "I know, what a total Bitch. She's really hot though."
Paul: "I know- I'd like to give that bitch the screaming Jesus."
Tom: "Me too, man."
by JemIsJerrica September 25, 2009
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