Schrödinger's Stoner

Someone who decides whether or not weed is addictive based on whether or not they need it.

Kyle: "James, you smoke weed too much. You're probably addicted."
James: "Nah bro weed isn't addictive bro. I can stop at any time I want to."

*4 hours later*

James: "I am going through a mildly stressful event that will probably resolve itself in the near future. I really need to go smoke."
Kyle: "You're a Schrödinger's Stoner, James."

by urwifesboyfriend June 14, 2021

Schrödinger's Happy Meal

You do not know if the toy in your Schrödinger's Happy Meal is a boy toy or a girl toy until you have opened it.

Child: mom, i got a girl toy :(
mom: you did not know if the toy was a boy toy or a girl toy, therefore it was a Schrödinger's Happy Meal

by AlternateIsopod July 6, 2023

Schrödinger's handjob

When you are asleep and having a wet dream, and you're not sure where it is a dream or whether it's your best mate wanking you off when you're sharing a bed

Ben woke up in pure euphoria and a wet patch, he rolled over to his best friend blake sleeping next to him. His euphoria swiftly turned to shock and exclaimed "oh fuck, I've had a Schrödinger's handjob"

by Hayden Schrödinger June 24, 2023

Schrödinger's Adjective

A made-up, highly nuanced adjective that is uttered or written in the moment to simplify a concept. However, whenever the adjective is analyzed, it loses all meaning.

Useful in over simplifications or dubious descriptions.

1: Soccer is just football but with "feet-hands", ya know?
2: Oh yeah, I guess so...
2: Wait, what do you mean by "feet-hands"?
1: I have no clue, guess it was a Schrödinger's Adjective

by foothands29 December 8, 2018

Schrödinger's Woke

A quantum superposition wherein a piece of media (such as a film, television or streaming series, etc) is simultaneously "woke" and "not woke" until that piece of media is either a financial success or failure - at which point, whiney conservatives on the internet will label it "woke" if said media bombs and "not woke" if it succeeds, thereby resolving the superposition. This strategy handily allows them to maintain their delusional worldview and avoid acknowledging the reality that the majority of the population, progressive or otherwise, just isn't that bothered by, for example, a black woman in this or that Star Wars show.

Internet conservatives before the Mario movie came out: "The Mario movie's going to bomb because it's woke, Princess Peach is such a girlboss! gEt wOkE gO bRoKe!"

THE SAME internet conservatives after the Mario movie came out and made bank: "The Mario movie sold like gangbusters because it rejects woke, something something Chris Pratt!"

A normal person: "Schrödinger's Woke strikes again!"

by ZackAkai July 11, 2024

Schrödinger's Garbage

A piece of media—such as a movie, book, television series, or video game—characterized by such poor quality or ambiguous tone that it is difficult to discern whether it was created as a serious work or intended as a parody.

"I couldn't tell if that movie was meant to be a serious thriller or a spoof—it’s total Schrödinger's Garbage. Every scene leaves you wondering if the bad acting and bizarre plot twists were intentional or just a sign of terrible filmmaking."

by normalmaximo November 10, 2024

Schrödinger's roll call

A thought experiment for online classes in which the student may be simultaneously present and absent as a result of their attendance being linked to studiousness

The class had 50 students online, when called on only 10 respond

It was a Schrödinger's roll call captured by teams.

by 11 tabs & it becomes Urban dic June 17, 2021