This person is the devil. He like small balls. He wouldnt mind if he could borrow some himself, considdering he doesn't have any. He likes to try and masturbate but fails because his dick is the size of a wall nut. or smaller. He could be on drugs but who knows only crackheads will tell if he is. He is socily awkward. He likes to talk about how big his dick is. but they dont really know because he doesnt want to embarrass himself in front of the ladies. He gets really jelouse. And will lose his temper if u piss him off. he has very little friends. He also doesn't have a life.
by John buttface May 30, 2018

This is my 50th time adding a definition about my name.
John is the name of an awesome guy who is gets all of the girls. He's pretty hot, too. Toned body, bushy black hair, and brown eyes. What he doesn't have in body height, he makes up for in a certain lengthy object. John might as well be considered the second coming of Christ, he's perfect in every way, so much so that he's been single his whole life and crying as we speak because that probably won't ever change.
After some surfing on www.urbandictionary.com, he found that there are other John's out there in similar situations, and is down anytime to communicate with fellow John's about how women may or may not be constantly plotting against them for reasons so minuscule they might as well be non-existent.
John is also constantly mistaken for his inanimate counterpart, and discarded-half brother, the toilet. Women often find it funny to define Johns as shit for this reason. But John's can unite in strong numbers to overcome any and all obstacles, making them a force to be reckoned with. Beware, the John.
John is the name of an awesome guy who is gets all of the girls. He's pretty hot, too. Toned body, bushy black hair, and brown eyes. What he doesn't have in body height, he makes up for in a certain lengthy object. John might as well be considered the second coming of Christ, he's perfect in every way, so much so that he's been single his whole life and crying as we speak because that probably won't ever change.
After some surfing on www.urbandictionary.com, he found that there are other John's out there in similar situations, and is down anytime to communicate with fellow John's about how women may or may not be constantly plotting against them for reasons so minuscule they might as well be non-existent.
John is also constantly mistaken for his inanimate counterpart, and discarded-half brother, the toilet. Women often find it funny to define Johns as shit for this reason. But John's can unite in strong numbers to overcome any and all obstacles, making them a force to be reckoned with. Beware, the John.
by They're holding me hostage January 11, 2019

John is one of the WORST insults you could call anyone.
Most people don’t know what it means, which is perfect. It means you’re fat, extremely ugly, annoying, lonely and a dumbass bitch so go ahead and call those skskskskrunchie loving freaks a John and then say: “if you don’t shut the fuck up right now I’m a skskskirt my foot up your ass”
You’re welcome😂
Most people don’t know what it means, which is perfect. It means you’re fat, extremely ugly, annoying, lonely and a dumbass bitch so go ahead and call those skskskskrunchie loving freaks a John and then say: “if you don’t shut the fuck up right now I’m a skskskirt my foot up your ass”
You’re welcome😂
by Carebear2007 November 3, 2019

A guy who finesses his way through life. Everyone wants a John because he was born to finesse and make the most money without trying. His finesse game is too strong for his rivals, so they tend to get very jealous. He's a guy with a big heart, but it takes someone special to bring out certain emotions and feelings. Overall he's a handful and a John doesn't take shit from nobody.
by A person with no name November 20, 2016

A complete absolute DICK HEAD who messes with your head and makes u fall in love with them and then you can't let go even though it feels like a thousand shards of glass sticking of your heart
by Ooo la la! June 26, 2016

by you are a john July 27, 2020
