Lame pop music performed by feminine men that wear makeup and have no historical knowledge of heavy metal.
Poser metal reared it's ugly head in the mid-1980's. Corporate television producers have tried to re-write rock history and give this type of teeny bopper bubblegum credibility within pop culture history. It was a joke then, is a joke now. Practioneers of this genre include Poison, Warrant, Winger, Slaughter, Skid Row, Motley Crue.
by Axl Gump August 4, 2006
Get the poser metalmug. A female who goes to metal or heavy rock shows and isnt afraid to get bruised and cut in the mosh pit. seriously doesnt give a damn because they know the show is totally worth it.
If your a chick and go to metal shows and are respected by the guys because even if you twist your ankle or have 11 people fall on top of you your still jumpin back into the mosh pit..you would be a metal chick...but they are more commonly known as metal heads anyways.
by Sabrina Lorentz May 20, 2007
Get the metal chickmug. My CB handle was Metal Mouth in the early 80s, but I never wore braces. I was the chew-em-up mobile and the spit-em-out base.
by Downstrike October 30, 2004
Get the metal mouthmug. Death metal is a subgenre of heavy metal generally involving low tuned guitars played with tremolo picking and many solos, double kick or blast beat drumming techniques, minor keys or atonality, and rapid time signature changes, chromatic chord progressions, and intricate song-writing. Death metal is the most underrated and underappreciated genre in music, with many of the most famous bands full of world class musicians that taught at the most prestigious music schools in the world. The best aspects of every genre of music (new wave of British heavy metal, classical musical, thrash metal, grindcore, black metal and jazz) can be found in death metal albums articulated in a more intelligent and enjoyable manner than in the aforementioned genres. Examples are Atheist's take on jazz, Arghoslent's NWOBHM riffs, Necrophagist's Beethoven-influenced riffs, and Appalling Spawn's grindcore elements. Death metal produces the most thought-provoking and intelligent lyrics of any genre as referenced below.
Guy 1: Why do you think death metal appeals almost exclusively to very intelligent people?
Guy 2: As illuminated in the documentary The Boy With the Incredible Brain, many very high IQ people think in terms of shapes and music that forms shapes. It is not hard to understand why the ebb and flow of death metal riffs appeal almost exclusively to very intelligent people who sense and recognize the shape and contours of the very intricate and highly educated music that is death metal.
Guy 1: What are some death metal songs which shed light not only on natural aspects of the human condition, but more generally on important societal problems directly connected to people's thinking?
Guy 2: Enthralled in Essence (Atheist), Slaughter of Innocence, Demise of the Clone (Suffocation), Mirrors of Reason (Monstrosity), Omnipresent Perception (Beyond Creation), Dethrone the Hypocrites (Anata), Closeminded Failure (Solstice), The Truth About Lies (Krabathor), Lack of Comprehension (Death), Scavenger of Human Sorrow (Death), The Sadistic Motives Behind Bereavement Letters (Arsis) and Shallow Disbelief (Experiment Fear) all have very intelligent messages meeting your requirements.
Guy 2: As illuminated in the documentary The Boy With the Incredible Brain, many very high IQ people think in terms of shapes and music that forms shapes. It is not hard to understand why the ebb and flow of death metal riffs appeal almost exclusively to very intelligent people who sense and recognize the shape and contours of the very intricate and highly educated music that is death metal.
Guy 1: What are some death metal songs which shed light not only on natural aspects of the human condition, but more generally on important societal problems directly connected to people's thinking?
Guy 2: Enthralled in Essence (Atheist), Slaughter of Innocence, Demise of the Clone (Suffocation), Mirrors of Reason (Monstrosity), Omnipresent Perception (Beyond Creation), Dethrone the Hypocrites (Anata), Closeminded Failure (Solstice), The Truth About Lies (Krabathor), Lack of Comprehension (Death), Scavenger of Human Sorrow (Death), The Sadistic Motives Behind Bereavement Letters (Arsis) and Shallow Disbelief (Experiment Fear) all have very intelligent messages meeting your requirements.
by Eric Kazinsky February 12, 2015
Get the Death Metalmug. Style of metal more popular in Scandanavia, including bands like Finntroll, Otyg, Korpiklaani, and Lumsk. Folk metal is usually recognized by the inclusion of instruments such as violins, woodwinds, and accordians, and also by the more melodic non-screaming style of singing and more medieval sounding riffs.
Someone asked me if I liked Slipknot, so I punched him clear in the sternum and as he was gasping for air on the floor I told him I only listened to pure Finnish Folk Metal, not pussy American merchandise-metal.
by SirHonorable October 11, 2005
Get the Folk Metalmug. Pretty much everyone who bashed metal here has probably only listened to false bands like Slipknot. Most of the definitions about how metal sucks were extremley biased. Because I'm bored, I'm going to dissect this bullshit definition.
"Can you sing about something else besides Satan?"
Groups like Nuclear Assault and Sacred Reich sang about the government and war. In fact, I don't even think those bands sing any songs that go like "HAIL SATAN!". There's other bands who sing about that too. I've also heard many other metal songs about ancient Egypt, medievel times, etc etc (most notabley with Iron Maiden)
"Can you sing at all?"
Rob Halford can hit a 5th octave. Nuff said. Oh and I also suggest Iron Maiden, Edguy, Dream Theater, Hammerfall, Blind Guardian, Helloween...
"Can you not be such goth fucktards?"
Goth fucktards? Leather, spikes, and chains are hardly gothic. Gothic metal is it's own genre, and I'm not referring to "z0mg im so gawthik" bands like Slipknot and Korn, I'm talking about bands like Type-O-Negative, Paradise Lost, etc.
"Can you focus more on music and maybe write some non-retarded lyrics and maybe get someone who can actually sing to sing them?"
Again, using Iron Maiden as an example, alot of their songs are about history, and they aren't the only ones who do so...and refer to the list of bands above who can actually sing.
"Can you make it a little more normal and a little less like goth vampire shit?"
Refer to what I said about gothic metal
"Can you make it a little more closer to rock & roll?"
I hear alot of influences from early rock and roll in groups like Raven, Motorhead, Anvil, Tygers Of Pan Tang, Exciter.
"Can you go five seconds without mentioning Satan?"
Refer to my first answer.
"^And why the fuck do you do that anyways in the first place?"
Bands who DO sing about Satan do it for the same effect as a horror movie. Sure, some if it is cheesy as hell (like Venom for example), but that doesn't mean theres anything wrong with enjoying it.
"Do you even know the difference between something that sounds like shit and noise and mud vs. something that actually sounds good?"
That's a little subjective now...
"Can you sing about something else besides Satan?"
Groups like Nuclear Assault and Sacred Reich sang about the government and war. In fact, I don't even think those bands sing any songs that go like "HAIL SATAN!". There's other bands who sing about that too. I've also heard many other metal songs about ancient Egypt, medievel times, etc etc (most notabley with Iron Maiden)
"Can you sing at all?"
Rob Halford can hit a 5th octave. Nuff said. Oh and I also suggest Iron Maiden, Edguy, Dream Theater, Hammerfall, Blind Guardian, Helloween...
"Can you not be such goth fucktards?"
Goth fucktards? Leather, spikes, and chains are hardly gothic. Gothic metal is it's own genre, and I'm not referring to "z0mg im so gawthik" bands like Slipknot and Korn, I'm talking about bands like Type-O-Negative, Paradise Lost, etc.
"Can you focus more on music and maybe write some non-retarded lyrics and maybe get someone who can actually sing to sing them?"
Again, using Iron Maiden as an example, alot of their songs are about history, and they aren't the only ones who do so...and refer to the list of bands above who can actually sing.
"Can you make it a little more normal and a little less like goth vampire shit?"
Refer to what I said about gothic metal
"Can you make it a little more closer to rock & roll?"
I hear alot of influences from early rock and roll in groups like Raven, Motorhead, Anvil, Tygers Of Pan Tang, Exciter.
"Can you go five seconds without mentioning Satan?"
Refer to my first answer.
"^And why the fuck do you do that anyways in the first place?"
Bands who DO sing about Satan do it for the same effect as a horror movie. Sure, some if it is cheesy as hell (like Venom for example), but that doesn't mean theres anything wrong with enjoying it.
"Do you even know the difference between something that sounds like shit and noise and mud vs. something that actually sounds good?"
That's a little subjective now...
by Paul The Metal Maniac October 10, 2006
Get the heavy metalmug. Metal Hipsterism is analogous in behavior to mainstream Hipsterism, only in this case applied to the numerous metal sub-genres instead of indie music. While Metal Hipsters cast disdain on the traditional Hipsters, their love of classifying metal genres has essentially turned them into what they hate.
Classic symptoms you are a Metal Hipster:
1) You hate any band that has achieved any kind of mainstream success. Your favorite term for these bands is "Mallcore".
2) You use at least three adjectives to classify every metal sub-genre. i.e., Finnish Melodic Death Metal, Vegetarian Progressive Grindcore, or Crust Punk Viking Symphonic Extremoganza. You argue the finer points of Extreme Black Deathcore vs. Black Death Extremecore.
3) You are instantly enraged if a random passerby has a fucking clue what you are talking about, and are then motivated to invent a few more subgenres.
Classic symptoms you are a Metal Hipster:
1) You hate any band that has achieved any kind of mainstream success. Your favorite term for these bands is "Mallcore".
2) You use at least three adjectives to classify every metal sub-genre. i.e., Finnish Melodic Death Metal, Vegetarian Progressive Grindcore, or Crust Punk Viking Symphonic Extremoganza. You argue the finer points of Extreme Black Deathcore vs. Black Death Extremecore.
3) You are instantly enraged if a random passerby has a fucking clue what you are talking about, and are then motivated to invent a few more subgenres.
"I despise Lamb of God. Marketing crappy metal to crappy kids with M-16 patriotism. Oh God, I have turned into a lame Metal Hipster!"
"Killswitch Engage isn't even Metal. Their first 2 albums were okay but then they got Howard Jones and I think they moved to Motown Records...Oh God, I have turned into a lame Metal Hipster!"
"The fact that you even think Behemoth sounds anything like, let's say, Underoath or Hatebreed (both can safely be labeled "metalcore"), makes me quite skeptical of your knowledge of metal. If you can manage to put your biases aside for a second (i.e., your personal preference for certain genres of metal, because I know that you have them), please explain to me why it is that you think that bands like Necrophagist and Behemoth are not TDM and blackened death metal, respectively. I honestly would like to know why you don't consider Muhammed Suicmez's playing to be technical and why you don't think Adam Darski's voice qualifies as black metal-sounding. Can you, as objectively as possible, explain why you believe that the one article you posted is correct and that the countless number of professional magazines, music reviews, and metal bands out there that claim that Necrophagist is indeed tech death and Behemoth definitely is a blackened death metal band are wrong and OMG I AM METAL HIPSTER LEVEL OVER 9000!!!!"
"Killswitch Engage isn't even Metal. Their first 2 albums were okay but then they got Howard Jones and I think they moved to Motown Records...Oh God, I have turned into a lame Metal Hipster!"
"The fact that you even think Behemoth sounds anything like, let's say, Underoath or Hatebreed (both can safely be labeled "metalcore"), makes me quite skeptical of your knowledge of metal. If you can manage to put your biases aside for a second (i.e., your personal preference for certain genres of metal, because I know that you have them), please explain to me why it is that you think that bands like Necrophagist and Behemoth are not TDM and blackened death metal, respectively. I honestly would like to know why you don't consider Muhammed Suicmez's playing to be technical and why you don't think Adam Darski's voice qualifies as black metal-sounding. Can you, as objectively as possible, explain why you believe that the one article you posted is correct and that the countless number of professional magazines, music reviews, and metal bands out there that claim that Necrophagist is indeed tech death and Behemoth definitely is a blackened death metal band are wrong and OMG I AM METAL HIPSTER LEVEL OVER 9000!!!!"
by ether.real April 1, 2010
Get the Metal Hipstermug.