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Jessica

Definitely not wifey material. A basic bar hoe that seeks refuge in bars and night clubs so that unsuspecting men can't tell exactly how orange she is as a result of her attachment to layers of bronzer and/or tanning beds. You'll most likely find her gravitating towards men out of her league, or even more pathetic: taken. If you make friends with a Jessica, don't ask her to do your makeup or else you might open your eyes to a raccoon staring back at you in the mirror. She's the greatest friend temporarily, but next thing you know every night is ruined because she's too fixed on another guy and you're stuck covering her ass. One thing is for certain, you'll always look amazing next to Jessica even on your worst of days. At least there's that upside.
Pedro: Hey, man. I need to borrow your Clorox.

Ronnie: Sure thing. Why you need it?
Pedro: Jessica was over last night. I need to get her face off my pillow.
by thornfieldghost August 28, 2016
mugGet the Jessicamug.

Jessica

She is the bitchiest of people rude annoying and she will stab your back she takes your mans and she loves to be rude she’s always on peoples nerves also she dosent deserve her mans she needs sum milk
Girl eww is that Jessica

Boy yes she’s sooo rude
by Cuban-jerzey October 23, 2018
mugGet the Jessicamug.

Jessica

Man that girl is such a Jessica ugh
by KINGHANDO August 13, 2020
mugGet the Jessicamug.

Jessica

jessica is that one bitchy sister in law with a fat ass
Jessica's my bitchy sister in law with a fat ass
by ihatehomework December 15, 2018
mugGet the Jessicamug.

Jessica

The most beautiful girl that I've ever had the privilege of seeing and dating. She brings out all of the positive factors in an empress. She is very emotionally sensitive so if you're dating a jessica, be sure to handle her with as much love and care that you can possibly muster up. She is the worlds sweetest devil and it shows. She may try to play a cheating joke every now and then to make you jealous (don't do that, I hate it) but really, she's the most loyal friend and mate anyone has ever had the pleasure to meet.

Word of advice; she's the most

beautiful singer you'll ever hear. You won't find any more joy in hearing someones voice than hers. Be sure to sing to her whenever you get the chance, because eventually, she'll sing to you...

Best girl 9/10 because I'm the one she needs
Joey: "Why are you listening to Haileys song by eminem?"

Andrew: "it's Jessica's favourite song"
by NotAndrewB February 4, 2018
mugGet the Jessicamug.

Jessica

Jessica is a nice, loyal, tall, serious but also funny, beautiful and kind girl. She can be rude at times but she's always there for her friends when they need her. A lot of guys want her bit she doesn't want any of them and she doesn't give them a chance. Everyone is scared of her because she is so tall and scary and her hits really do hurt. No one dares to mess with her because they know she will fuck them up. She excels academically in most of her subjects and is athletic as well. She's just truly an amazing person and you are lucky if you are her friend.
Jessica is amazing.
Jessica is rude but also funny
by hajameijwnskskwjmskskskwk February 15, 2021
mugGet the Jessicamug.

Jessica

A Jessica eats a lot of ice cream but most importantly pickle flavour.
Jessica: hey have you tried out the new pickle flavour ice cream

Person: no you fucking weirdo
by Thanksfornothingbitch August 3, 2019
mugGet the Jessicamug.

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