Douche'

dou·ché
do͞oˈSHā/
exclamation: douché

(in fencing) used as an acknowledgment of a hit to one's opponent, who happens to be a douche.
used as an acknowledgment during a discussion of a good or clever point made at one's expense (who happens to be a douche) by another person.

Walking to my car after work this evening. A group of 4 young dudes walks up to the crosswalk the same time I do. As we wait I hear them chatting among themselves. One turns to me and says "nice hair. Did ur mom fuck a smurf?". To which his buddies laugh. Without missing a beat I look at him, smile, and say "nice face. Did ur mom fuck a horse?" His buddies literally double over howling with laughter. "Douche'!!"

by ForgingGraphemes September 9, 2016

douche bag

A human being who commits an atrocity such as stealing someone's life work and calling it their own. These douche bags tend to laugh at others misfortunes, or even worse, create the others misfortunes. It is often that douche bags steal from others that are not well known, but brilliant minds, who end up dying alone and talking to a laser beam pigeon in the mean time.

Edison: Hey, ah, Tesla, you're pretty smart, right?

Tesla: Yeah, I guess.

Edison: I'll pay you the equivalency of 1 million dollars if you fix my fucked up DC generators and motors.

Tesla agrees and does all of the work

Tesla: Done

Edison: HAHAHA TESLA YOU DON'T AMERICAN HUMOR YOU FOREIGN FUCK.

Tesla: .... douche bag.

by nakedsarah May 8, 2013

Douche

A small-minded, dim-witted person in need of guidance.

1. Hey Douche, are you able to get me to the hospital.
2. Isn't he such a Douche, he can't even locate a woman's vage.

by JacoX May 5, 2009

the sexiest strawberry scented douche in America

Pedro Martinez

Pedro Martinez is the sexiest strawberry scented douche in America

by SA Panther August 25, 2023

douche-spanked

when you get verbally abused by another adult for being a major douche

I ate at a restaurant the other night, the waiter pulled me aside and douche-spanked me for leaving a $1 tip

by tjdabomb August 29, 2011

Douche bomb

Statements made by a douchey person that are absurd.

Douche bomb made by Lane: Rockabilly is the clans music of the red states.

Lane: I know suffering. I DJ’ed in Haiti.

by Ms. Dick Pickles January 24, 2022

Douche and Turd philosophy

The idea that every election is between a giant douche and a turd sandwich. Especially applicable to the United States.

'i believe in the Douche and Turd philosophy"
"What is that?"
"I'm voting between a giant douche and a turd sandwich!"
"That's how it always is!"

by EG FRESH November 13, 2021