absolute andrew

A kind of cocktail.

"Hey did you try Absolute Andrew?"
"Nah man, I prefer Absolute Ashley."

by Hola213 December 7, 2013

Absolution

Absolution: When you giving it to your wife from behind but you suddenly have the urge to take a big shit and your son comes right on time to swap you and you keep hearing your wife's moans as you lay down the biggest turd of the history of turds

Man 1 : I am so happy I have a family now, used absolution yesterday. Great way to bond more with your son
Man 2: I know its those small things that matter.

by geoxd657 April 13, 2018

Absoluteness

Absoluteness- YOU ARE AT FULL COCK NOW SPREAD IT ALL OVER THIS TEMPLE

Damn he told me i was Absoluteness

by Octo_Senpai February 5, 2022

You Absolute Soggy Flannel

1: Used generally to call someone an idiot or a bit stupid

2: If you say "you have the personality of a soggy flannel" basically means youre dry asf and you need to have a bit more personality babes xox

1: Youre so bad at obbys, you absolute soggy flannel

2: I was talking to him last night and honest to god he was like a soggy flannel

by CalpolInhaler June 4, 2023

Absolute Unit

The absolute definition of a chonker.
An absolute unit = a gigachad of immaculate form.
Goncalos are natural born absolute units.

Goncalo: I'm an ABSOLUTE UNIT
The rest of the lads: yeah whatever...

by Le Handle May 10, 2021

Absolutely Not

She 100% likes the man bun

Me: “ do you like the man bun”
Her: “absolutely not”

by Idevenknowyet September 12, 2020

ABSOLUTE PSYCHO

Okay, if I... if I chop you up in a meat grinder, and the only thing that comes out, that's left of you, is your eyeball, you'r- you're PROBABLY DEAD! You're probably going to - not *you,* I'm just sayin', like, if you- if somebody were to, like, push you into a meat grinder, and, like, your- one of your *finger bones* is still intact, they're not gonna pick it up and go, "Well see, yeah it wasn't deadly, it wasn't an instant kill move! You still got, like, this part of your finger left!" NO I'M NOT GONNA PUT YOU INTO A MEAT GRINDER. I'M NOT GONNA PUT YOU INTO A MEAT GRINDER. NO. I'm making a *reference* to the fact that, like, if I, like, if I were to get fucking KILLED... I don't know, YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'. If- if- okay, if you were to- okay we're gonna take humans out of this, if alien Globgobglobgo 1 fuckin' shoots a disintegrating ray at alien Globglo 2, if there's only fucking *TEETH LEFT,* it's- it's fucking *you're dead, you're dead*.

"If I were to put you in a meat grinder," goddamnit, it's so fucked up! You understand what I'm sayin' though, I'm not actually saying that I'm going to put somebody in a *meat grinder,* goddamnit. Whatever.

That ABSOLUTE FUCKING PSYCHO THREATENED TO PUT ME IN A MEAT GRINDER. ABSOLUTE PSYCHO MEANS JERMA985.

by TwitchChatReal1984 August 10, 2022