Someone who does not realize that you are in the stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments can occur when taking a poop at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact. This should not be confused with an Uncle Ted.
So there I was, minding my own business in the crapper, when some dude came out of nowhere and Turd Burgled me. I started coughing hoping to alert him of my presence, but the Turd Burglar just wouldn't stop trying to get into the stall. Needless to say, it was a terrifying experience.
When you're about to take a shit in a public bathroom stall, some ass-hole constantly tries to open the stall door, not realizing after first time that it's occupied.
you've just plopped this massive log in the john; you stand up, turn around and look down to behold your achievement and ... the damn turd burglar already swiped your poop ... there's nothing in the shallow water.