Newell, WV

A four-street shithole in the northern panhandle of West Virginia. Founded in 1905 when a man named Newell gave up his last hope of finding anywhere decent to live and settled down with a one-eyed, toothless, backwoods woman and produced Newell’s first official retard. Newell’s two claims to fame are its large population of mullet-wearin', wall-eyed, gun-totin’, tobacky-chewin’ illiterates; and the presence of Mountaineer, a gaming resort filled with coffin dodgers and welfare cases spending their gubment checks and shitting themselves because they don’t want to leave the nickel slot machines. Outsiders often hear the sound of “Dueling Banjoes” in their heads when driving through it.

Outsider: What the fuck is that? Banjo music?
Newellite 1: What's he sayin’, Cletus?
Newellite 2: Cecil, you know I don't know forrin’.

(Newell, WV)

by Frammed August 26, 2008

alli newell

A totally cool girl who is super fun and awesome if you just get to know her! She has a good sense of humor, and tends to laugh when a situation isn't good. She is someone you want in you're life because she will stick through you through thick and thin if you respect and pay attention to her. She seem pretty quiet, but she doesn't take shit from anyone. She'd rather be alone than with people who take her for granted and aren't interested in knowing how special she is.

"Dude did you see that girl?"
"Yeah she's such an Alli Newell

by Hamish Detaye November 14, 2014

Bailey newell

He is slightly retarded n likes the taste of pen ink

That person in a bit of a Bailey newell

by Jack m 127 October 16, 2019

Kaison Newell

Very stupid boy with no common sense. Dates every girl he sees but dumps them a week after.

Hi Kaison Newell

by (londonbaby) October 28, 2019

Oakley Newell

A person who never makes mistakes

I am good at everything I must be Oakley Newell.

by Wubbis November 26, 2022

Newell

Newell, WV: A four street shithole in the northern panhandle of West Virginia. Founded in 1905 when a man named Newell gave up his last hope of finding anywhere decent to live and settled down with a one-eyed, toothless, backwoods woman and produced Newell's first official retard. Newell's two claims to fame are its large population of mullet-wearin', wall-eyed, gun-totin', tobacky-chewin' illiterates; and the presence of Mountaineer, a gaming resort filled with coffin dodgers and welfare cases spending their gubment checks and shitting themselves because they don't want to leave the nickel slot machines. Outsiders often hear the sound of "Dueling Banjoes" in their heads when driving through it.

Outsider: What the fuck is that? Banjo music?
Newellite 1: What's he saying, Cletus?
Newellite 2: Cecil, you know I don't know forrin'!

(Newell)

by Frammed September 26, 2008

Newell

unlearned, ignorant, simple person, as distinguished from the educated; an ignoramus who makes threats using blogs Lies like a sidewalk Tax Evader "Big Daddy" Newell likes to pretend they have a job but also likes being destitute possess low to none intellectual powers, commonly, a person without understanding from birth; a natural fool; aka hillbilly living in a squalid shack with lots of little ones from 3 different teen moms loves white tee shirts and baseball caps, raging anger issues since birth aka as a bad temper, very violent towards small kids and women and some types of cats and dogs and gardening equipment. Is easily calmed down by watching a goldfish swim in a small tank "simple things for a simpleton"

hillbilly Newell Big Daddy Status Quo squalid Boyce fool ignoramus idiot liar bad temper violent goldfish simple

by TruthPosted September 29, 2011