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A group of people who are in the middle of a class action lawsuit, because they conned a bunch of clients into investing in funds that would mostly benefit the advisor.
If you get a phone call from an American Express Financial Advisor, my advise to you is to run. These advisors live in nice homes off of "your" money
by Conned October 15, 2008
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advisor

Advisors are the highest-ranking aliens on Half-Life. Their body shape is worm-like and they have robotic devices to enhance their abilities. They have a long, disgusting, long tongue that can inject into numerous materials (e.g. flesh, skin etc. etc.) And it's probably how they feed themselves. They have the ability to levitate and fly. They have telekinetic powers as they can crush, pull/push things with their mind. They have a weird, ancient-looking collar around their... Neck? Anyways, It has some strange signs and it probably means something, meh.
(noun) Flying maggot

Oh, Hi Advisor! *death*
by Solo_D January 8, 2017
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Tincture Advisor

A person who offers unsolicited advice While intoxicated. Their advise or solution has been diluted with alcohol. Advise has been influenced or saturated by 25-60% alcohol. Sometimes up to 90%.
“ My tincture advisor is making a hell of a lot of sense right now” as they down their 12th beer.
by Puddyhead January 7, 2022
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Service advisor denial

Where management drag a tech out to act as a service advisor and weeks later that person is in denial that they are now a service advisor. In the worst cases the new service advisor may be genuinly convinced that they will "go back into the workshop any day now".
Poor guy still thinks hes a mechanic. Epic case of service advisor denial.
by Exodus June 9, 2018
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the advisors

Hairy balls. Used in context with Woodrow Wilson
"Man did you see that hottie Lori at the show last night?

Yea, she had Woodrow Wilson and
the advisors at attention."
by TDoug June 10, 2008
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Academic Advisor

A faculty member of your university purportedly assigned to help students plan their course schedules to fit each student's degree and career plans but who are not required to know or provide accurate information regarding available courses, pre-requisites, required courses, course alternatives, etc. and often supply advice that ends up being detrimental to the student.

Side of "academic advising" include:

Taking one or more classes that are unnecessary and ending up taking 5 years to earn a 4 year degree.

Realizing 2 weeks before graduation that you could have graduated a semester early if it weren't for that "career exploration" class you took freshman year that your advisor recommended you take to "discover your calling" or "meet people in your major."

Realizing that those transfer credits actually could have transferred and you did not need to re-take that class.
My academic advisor said I had to take a full year of underwater basket weaving courses for my degree, turns out I don't and now I won't graduate this semester.

My advisor screwed me over, I'll never the mistake of taking his advice again.
by blubeblob August 13, 2012
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financial advisor

A person, usually male, who lives in a really nice home, drives a really nice car, usually has a wife who doesn't work. All his possessions are due to the money he makes off of his clients when he buys and sells funds using their money. The advise he gives is to benefit himself and not you. Do yourself a favor and keep your money in the bank.
I used to have a small fortune in my port folio, then I took the advise of a financial advisor. Now he has half my money, and I don't have a pot to piss in.
by Just say no October 22, 2008
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