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Scratching your arse and smelling your fingers

British • Verb Phrase
Intentionally doing something you know will cause you pain or emotional discomfort, just in order to feel something.
Person 1: This tastes absolutely disgusting.
Person 2: Why are you still eating it?

Person 1: ... I'm not really sure.
Person 2: You're just scratching your arse and smelling your fingers then, aren't you?
by Leery Loon November 26, 2021
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scratching the record

When a male or female pleasures a female through her jeans using a hand motion that resembles rubbing a vinyl record in order to get a scratch sound effect. This motion usually precedes sex and is used during fore play.
"Yo I got her so hot she reached down and started scratching the record. You know what happened next."
by that one dude 1 October 5, 2009
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Scratching Post

Not a serious relationship or partner but a person to rub up against.
I'm going on Tinder to find myself a scratching post.
by Ilikepink November 22, 2017
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Scratching the McCain Bus

A euphemism for masturbating. The phrase was first coined when John McCain's campaign tour bus collided with a van in Miami in August 2008.
Man, I was so horny the other day even scratching the McCain Bus didn't help relieve the tension.
by Stringer57 October 18, 2008
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Scratching the record

Verb. When a girl goes to town on herself.
Even the Beastie Boys stand no chance when she's scratching the record.
by Fstyle9 April 8, 2017
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Scratching Monster

Also know as the Scratchy Monster, a story talked about between children of a being that comes in the middle of the night and leaves little scratches on people. The story was made by kids as a way to explain why sometimes they would wake up with scratches they don't remember receiving.

Some kids say he comes when you have been bad but the more common believe is that the monster has no reason, he's simple not a nice guy.
Basically any time a kid goes to bed and wakes up with a scratch he or she didn't have when going to bed is labeled as a Scratching Monster attack.
by AnimeLoveLover123 July 24, 2014
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scratching the paint

From the Spanish phrase "Rayar la pintura" which means to damage the relationship, usually but not always by cheating on a partner.
Bill was a philanderer, his friends all knew that he had been scratching the paint off his marriage for years.
Charlene's tantrums caused John to feel that she'd been scratching the paint on their relationship.
by Alsatian_Farmer January 10, 2017
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