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statistics

The mathamatical study of the distribution of data on any subject to prove any point you're trying to make, when whining about it doesn't work.
39% of all statistics are made up.
by jt July 14, 2003
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sadistic humor

Humor originally created by Satan. 1. An act almost always only funny for the one doing it. 2. Taking satisfaction from someone else pain. Usually the first signs of a serial killer.
Stan: "Why did you pull my chair out from under me?"
George: "Ha Ha, suck it motha fucka."
Stan: "That wasn't funny, Thats sadistic humor!"
George: "I am going to papercut you until you die and then collect your fingernails."
by VagDuncker December 15, 2013
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statistics

Most of the time, statistics are bullshit.
by Clinker June 19, 2008
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Fake Statistics

A fake percentage to show off knowledge, stupidity, or to harass a group of people.
Example of "Fake Statistics".

Bill, "Hey dude, did you know that 39% of jocks in our school are school are gay?!"

Victor, "LOLWUT"
by Jerio November 8, 2009
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Rasmussen Statistics

Fake or selectively massaged statistics published in the interest of supporting a particular narrative. Based on techniques from "How to Lie with Statistics."
Rasmussen Statistics include positive poll selection, house bias and sampling distortion and are generally inaccurate and counter factual.
Named for celebrity pollster Scott Rasmussen who selectively did not poll PA-12 because he knew the liberal candidate would win.
Rasmussen statistics are often cited by teabaggers, conservatives, and other followers of the Tea Party Movement....for example, "the Tea Party Movement is bipartisan and multi-racial" is an example of Rasmussen Statistics.
by matoko_chan May 20, 2010
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statistics

The study of percentages, bars, graphs, and charts, all in an attempt to make some sort of logical conclusion out of a bunch of numbers so that even more percentages, bars, graphs, and charts can be made.
Statistics may not be of practical use in everyday life, unless you own a casino.
by AYB July 29, 2003
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Sadistic Nerd

Someone who was most probably made fun of in high school by jocks. Years later he is tormenting them since the jocks now work for him.
Sadistic Nerd: "You got that right, I'm the kid you threw in a dumpster every weak, now if I don't see a coffee on my desk in 2 minutes, you're FIRED BIATCH!"
High School Jock: "y-y-y-yes boss"
by ionisis March 16, 2009
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