morticulture

horticulture, as practiced by poorly trained groundskeepers, which causes the mutilation and eventual death of landscape plants

The brown, leafless shrubs, pruned into stick balls, were innocent victims of morticulture.

by pinkoursula January 21, 2010

Rigor Mortis

Rigor Mortis happens about 3-6 hours after death. It starts in the head, and goes down to the feet. It begins to leave through the feet and exits through the head. This has nothing to do with blood. That is post mortem lividty. Rigor mortis occurs as a result of a chemical change in the muscles of the decedent, causing them to become very stiff and difficult to manipulate.

Also, this has nothing to do with erections that is called a "priapism".

Because this person has been dead for 13 hours, rigor mortis has set in, and I am having trouble moving them.

by DanniCupcake October 28, 2007

nigga mortis

When a white person is hanging out with any amount of black people and drops the word nigga. They immediately stiffen up and stay as still as possible in the hopes that the black people won't recognize they said the word nigga.

Some random white dude says nigga to a bunch of black guys, then the nigga mortis occurs.

by Grig starrrrrrrrrrr October 4, 2010

profugus mortis

An insanely good metal band from Canada. They incorporate folk music, violins and a large helping of badass into their music.

I listened to their cd for 2 weeks straight, then put some other music on because I didn't want to overdo it... 10 seconds in I put profugus mortis back on because the other stuff just didn't cut it.

by Ray M August 22, 2007

Pre-Morti-Literati

Fear of dying before finishing all the books on your books to be read list

My friend explained my sleepless nights are caused by Pre-Morti-Literati, which is the fear of dying before you've read all the books on your "to be read" list

by Joanne Christenson June 14, 2013

Nigor Mortis

Corpse-like dependency on the welfare system

JaQuon was a 3rd-generation welfare recipient, whose lack of contibution as a gainfully-employed member of society placed him in a state of nigor mortis.

by JaQuon September 15, 2009

rigor mortis

when someone's dead for a while and their limbs stiffen (not the penis, though if the corpse is laid face down, the flow of blood to the penis can result in an erection.. a treat for necrophiliacs)

when johnny tried to make the dead man give him a hand job, ted said "you idiot! the guy won't move! it's rigor mortis!", so then johnny killed ted and had ted finish the job before rigor mortis set in

by I TURN CORPSES UPSIDE DOWN May 30, 2006