Cynical

1. An adjective describing a person with sarcastic, witty, quirky, pessimistic who rejects all conventions, whether of religion, manners, housing, dress, or decency, advocating the pursuit of virtue in a simple and unmaterialistic lifestyle.

2. An individual in Urban Dictionary who likes to stir the turd and add sarcastic, funny, and/or assholey defenitions.

You are so cynical, you make me throw up large, giant, man eating larvae.

by The Amazing Asshole January 26, 2009

cynical

The adjective for an individual who attributes all actions to selfish motives. Becoming cynical comes from someone just not giving a damn about the rest of the human race and is recommended for all Americans.

Person : "So yeah, this emo kid posted this myspace bullitin where he said he would kill himself."
Cynic: "That's great, hope he actually did it."
Person: "WTF? You cynical jerk! You should be ashamed for saying things like that!"
Cynic: "At least, I can stand on my own two feet..."

by Darkest_Elite May 28, 2006

cynical

The only way to be.

Look at how fuckin shitty everyone and everything is.

HOW could anyone NOT be cynical?

The whole world is homosexual.

by To hell with this queer ass planet. March 12, 2005

cynical grave

cynical grave is the best crip walker on earth, he crip walks in red shoes yeahyeah audio maker cool

ayo this nigga cynical grave is hot as fuck

by CG360 April 4, 2021

Cynical Sam

The act of shoving a bottle rocket in your pee hole, and inserting it into a girl's vagina.

I just gave Scott a Cynical Sam.

by Princess TRiZ December 11, 2011

cynical wankers

You seem like one yourself by complaining about it and acting like you aren't cynical. Now that's cynical.

by master bates IV September 6, 2003

Cynical Matt

Cynical Matts are people whom generally have a deeply cynical and depressing outlook on life whilst expressing this in a way that is funny and cheers up companions and themselves. As a result of this, Cynical Matts tend to be very witty and intelligent as well as a champion at 'that's what she said'.

Person one: Arghn that test felt so long and hard!
Person Two: That's what she said!
Person One: you are such a Cynical Matt

by Katietron April 8, 2010