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dick in a box

Popularized in the 2006 SNL short starring Justin Timberlake, this notorious yet considerate gift arrangement is perfect for any occasion, i.e. Christmas, Hannakah, or Kwanzaa. Follow these steps for the perfect gift.
Step 1. Cut a hole in a box.
Step 2. Put your junk the box.
Step 3. Let her open the box.
John: Yo I gave my wife the best gift last night.
Bob: What was it? a diamond ring? a fancy car? a house in the hills?
John: Those dont express how I feel. I gave her my dick in a box.
by B Lane December 10, 2008
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dick hand

The hand a prostitute uses to grab a dick.
This is my dick hand, and that is my pimp hand.
by Michalak October 4, 2003
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dick in a box

1. make a hole in a box
2. put your junk in that box
3. make her open the box

It's a dick in a box, giirll.
I want a dick in a box for Kwanzaa.
by George Ellis December 26, 2006
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The Dick Meter

n. A scale to use if something sucks really, really bad.
When used, use terms analogous to parts of a male penis.
Oh man, on the Dick Meter, that movie sucked all the way to the balls!!

That car crash sucked so bad! On the Dick Meter, it sucked full-shaft PLUS the balls!
by Charlie Gallagher January 8, 2008
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Dick Jitters

When one has consumed too much Viagra (or any e.d. drug) and is having problems. Since the chemical involved in stimulating the penis is similar to caffeine, and since one can get the "jitters" from drinking too much coffee... hence the "dick jitters."
I wanted to make sure I really knocked the socks off that blonde the other night, so I took two Viagra... but I ruined everything when I got the dick jitters!
by Neptunium January 17, 2009
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Chili-Dicking

Someone who's just half-assing their job. Commonly used as a verb to describe the lazy ass behavior of an individual. Derives possibly by a man realizing that he has "chili dick" and stops whatever he's doing and stares.
Quit chili-dicking around and get your asses to the line.

The next time I see you guys chili-dicking instead of working we'll stay after practice until the damn lights are turned off.
by buddhari65 October 10, 2012
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Smurf Dick

Someone who owns a Smurf Dick - a cock which has been man-handled and eventually turned an unworldly shade of blue.
I.e Rhys Farley (a proud Smurf Dick owner)
by EdeenSaawr October 14, 2011
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