crusty pirate

when a man ejaculates on a girls eye and then kicks her in the shin. she hops on one leg, and covers her eye all the while saying "aaaarrrggghhhh"

jill had no idea how bad a crusty pirate was until jack gave her gonherea of the eye.

by LT Long Dong March 3, 2009

crusty cooter

A vagina that is crusted over because of uncleanliness or sluttiness.

Lauren has a crusty cooter.

by Leroy September 20, 2004

crusty beard

Sexual act where the woman defecates on the man's mouth, smears the faeces around it creating a "beard" (or smears it on an existing beard) then sprinkles 100's and 1000's on it and licks it off.

Last night Helen gave me a crusty beard! Fuckin hell, that was twisted!

by CrazyGoat July 20, 2008

butt crusties

Tiny pieces of feces that reside on the hairs in between your butt cheeks.

Try as I might, the butt crusties could not be removed by wiping. Time for a shower.

by brahm2 September 28, 2003

Crusty Thong

The excess build up of ass cheese, vaginal discharge and sweat on that of a woman’s supposed “sexy” thong. This is do to the neglect of a daily shower and/or a fresh pair of panties. It will often resemble the color and texture of dried baby vomit.

Mom - (to daughter) Go get your sisters laundry and clean them please.
Daughter - Ewww!!! Mom!!! Come look at her crusty thong. It's the most revolting thing I have ever seen.
Mom - Dear lord, mother of holey Jesus, what in the hell is that!?
Daughter - Its her thong, I think. Im not touching it, you touch it.
Mom - There is no way I am touching that disgusting thing; besides, you found it first.
Daughter - No! I might catch something and OH MY FUCKING GOD!! I think it just moved.

by S.Reiter-H January 1, 2012

Crusty Mexican

It is a product of the sexual act of a man performing anal sex on a woman while squatting over a bucket. Right as the man is cumming into her anus she proceeds to deficate and urinate into the bucket as the semen is forced out by her feces. The mixture is left to ferment for 6-8 days. It is then added to baking mix and made into cupcakes. These are then sold at a local church bake sale under the title of "Crusty Mexican".

Mommy, this crusty Mexican is terriffic!!!

by LeggoMyPenis23 April 29, 2009

crusty corndog

A surprise sex act where, while having sex with a woman on the beach, the man pulls out, sticks his penis in the sand, and quickly shoves it back in.

I fucked my girlfriend on the beach the other day. She's been such a bitch lately I was tempted to give her a crusty corndog.

by pwntang April 16, 2008