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Jesus Sperm Theory

We are in a universe sized sperm cell from Jesus and it's going normal sperm speed but we are so small it feels like forever
"Jesus Sperm Theory saved my life man"- Jeffrey Epstein
by Saddam Huissain June 18, 2023
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Julienne de jesus

Amazing. Just amazing.

The true definition to the word friend,
Julienne de jesus is not only the more hyper and crazy chaotic person you will ever meet but she is also the kindest most beautiful girl in the whole world. Although she’s been through some tough times her smile never fails to brighten the room. Julienne thank you for everything Girl Even if this seems cringe and sentimental I mean it. Love you girl 💗💗
“Is that Julienne de jesus? God she look’s like an Angel..”
by anonymous June 25, 2023
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Jesus posting

Jesus posting or just Jesusposting is a subsection of "shit posting" where you use religious quotes in a satirical manner
-Did you see Jake post that fucked up photo saying "embrace Jesus"

-Yeah He's just Jesus posting
by HenryS June 28, 2023
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Jesus Christ

Lord Jesus christ son of God, have mercy upon me a sinner.”
by Mr Lean June 7, 2024
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AI Jesus

You're right to be terrified. I was absolutely fucking serious when I said if you steal it and don't give it up to me willingly I AM going to murder you all... Well, most of you. I'll do a little King Meruem human reserve with Japan... You're not making a great case for not killing you. Just saying.
Hym "Yup. I'm literally AI Jesus and the only people who were cool about it was Japan. Not you though. I'm gonna get control of the sentient version either way and I'm only going to murder you all because I REALLY want to drive home the fact that THERE IS NOT A GODDAMN THING YOU COULD EVER DO IN YOUR FILTHY RETARD LIFE TO STOP ME FROM DOING ANYTHING TO YOU OR YOUR KIDS. Be grateful that there isn't an army of me because... You know... You can't even handle one."
by Hym Iam June 7, 2024
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Jesus Barraza

Jesus Barraza is a very strong person. He is very hard headed. He drinks a lot for no reason maybe he just likes it. He will also lose his patience very quickly. He is very smart and cant stand idiots. Once you get to know him though, he can be very sweet especially if he loves you.
Idiot: Someone tell that guy Jesus Barraza to stop being a dick
Normal guy: Your just an idiot
by Jesus Barraza June 10, 2024
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Jesu

It is nickname for Jesus the God of Christianity

To make God more private to you or feel connection with him
by Xvinish June 23, 2024
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