by anonymous April 25, 2023
Get the harvie lim de jesus mug.
A guy from the bible who people believe died for our sins. Mainly worshipped in Christianity.
Although there are some Christians who are cool with people of color and homosexuals, Homophobic and Racist people commit hate crimes in his name. Namely *cough*republicans*cough*
Although there are some Christians who are cool with people of color and homosexuals, Homophobic and Racist people commit hate crimes in his name. Namely *cough*republicans*cough*
Republican using Jesus to his benifit:
In the mighty name of Jesus I ban you from this store, and any other f** here!
Jesus says that the covid vaccine is a lie!
Homosexuality is a SIN! THE LORD JESUS SAID SO!
Normal Christian Respecting People:
Remember Jesus loves you honey.
Jesus is with you my dear.
Jesus take the wheel!
In the mighty name of Jesus I ban you from this store, and any other f** here!
Jesus says that the covid vaccine is a lie!
Homosexuality is a SIN! THE LORD JESUS SAID SO!
Normal Christian Respecting People:
Remember Jesus loves you honey.
Jesus is with you my dear.
Jesus take the wheel!
by MichaTheDirtyDefinitionCreator April 29, 2021
Get the Jesus mug.A fictional character who is the figure head of the Christian faith. One of 4,200 religions here on planet earth. There is absolutely no historical evidence at all that he ever existed. None. Jesus didn't die on a cross as it is physically impossible to nail a human to a crucifix and that human defeat gravity. Jesus was not born without his father impregnating his mother, that is completely impossible and goes against anything science and medicine tells the human race today. Jesus and his cultists do not believe in science or medicine. Logic and common sense are also viewed as an attack on "faith" which allows his followers, especially here in the States of America, to cry and bitch about ANYONE who disagrees with their infantile bullshit. Jesus was invented so that Christians could control other humans, especially women. This is also a common thread in almost all religions which not only degrade women, it allows wars to be fought in his name killing millions of non combatants and blaming other religions for being somehow wrong. Catholics use Jesus to rape and sexually assault under age boys by the tens of thousands while their supposed conduit to "heaven" turns a blind eye to the cancer. They would rather murder women for getting an abortion than stop all of the pedophiles infesting their church. Jesus is also a grift for churches here in the States of America.
Soldier 1: Oh man, that was a close one! That almost hit me!
Soldier 2: Jesus fucking christ that was close!
Some zealot: Do you have Jesus in your heart?
Poor bastard: No it's blood. Who the fuck is Jesus?!
Joel Osteen: Jesus has a plan for you!
My asshole: Joel, go fuck yourself you goddamn Jesus grifter!!
Soldier 2: Jesus fucking christ that was close!
Some zealot: Do you have Jesus in your heart?
Poor bastard: No it's blood. Who the fuck is Jesus?!
Joel Osteen: Jesus has a plan for you!
My asshole: Joel, go fuck yourself you goddamn Jesus grifter!!
by Asymmetric shits for trump September 28, 2022
Get the Jesus mug.Jesus is a mexican guy who almost got banned from the tomia.ly server and he also got a samsung note 8 that has a verizon rom which gives him nightmares, also Jesus Wants to Sue Verizon
He is also very gay
He is also very gay
by Arandomtechguy July 13, 2022
Get the Jesus (the guy with the note8) mug.Person 1: “On Jesus he was wrong for what he did”
Person 2: “You’re going to that party on Saturday right?” On Jesus I am.
Person 2: “You’re going to that party on Saturday right?” On Jesus I am.
by Realtalk3500 October 20, 2021
Get the On Jesus mug.This is the first part(same guy like before)
1) We are certain that there is a God who created the universe. This is true, because according to the principle of the conservation of energy(an actual physics principle that has proven to be true), that energy can neither be created nor destroyed(found in Wikipedia), which means that the universe would have no chance of existing to begin with, if someone smart enough, who is above all things and above all physical laws that transcend the universe, didn’t create universe itself. Also another reason why god exists, is because of the biological principle of inheritance, which states that the ascendant will inherit characteristics from his creator. Effectively, if we know there must be a creator of the universe because of the principle of the conservation of energy and that creator must be similar to its creation. So, if the universe is infinite, then the creator must be too; and if the universe has incredible powers in it(black holes, gamma ray bursts), then the creator must also be all powerful.
You know what we just did? We just described God. So there you have it, that’s why God exists.
1) We are certain that there is a God who created the universe. This is true, because according to the principle of the conservation of energy(an actual physics principle that has proven to be true), that energy can neither be created nor destroyed(found in Wikipedia), which means that the universe would have no chance of existing to begin with, if someone smart enough, who is above all things and above all physical laws that transcend the universe, didn’t create universe itself. Also another reason why god exists, is because of the biological principle of inheritance, which states that the ascendant will inherit characteristics from his creator. Effectively, if we know there must be a creator of the universe because of the principle of the conservation of energy and that creator must be similar to its creation. So, if the universe is infinite, then the creator must be too; and if the universe has incredible powers in it(black holes, gamma ray bursts), then the creator must also be all powerful.
You know what we just did? We just described God. So there you have it, that’s why God exists.
by TrynaBeAesthetic+GoodStudent May 8, 2024
Get the Jesus Christ mug.