Jesus Handshake

A Jesus handshake is when someone spits on a cock then sucks it passionately while jacking it off and rubbing the balls. Once the man cums, they smear the cum all over the hands and rub it in their face then rub the cock on their eyes.

Person 1: Yo this person maya is a hot chick
Person 2: Yeah she gave me a good ol’ Jesus handshake!

by Cosmiccun7 December 13, 2022

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Single Serve Jesus

A product for churches to distribute wafer and communion grape juice in packages similar to single serve crackers and cheese or Lunchables.

Ever since the communion when Mrs Crab downed half the wine in the chalice and back-washed the other half, our church has switched to Single Serve Jesus.

by Flhu May 9, 2018

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JESUS

A person who is incredibly nice and kind in many ways, often associated with God or Jesus Christ. This person is likely to be successful and far from boring. They always know how to keep people engaged and are known by a lot of people. They carry themselves with royalty and dignity, showing warmth and wisdom in everything they do.

“Man, that guy is so Jesus-like—he’s always helping people and spreading positivity wherever he goes.”

by ITellISayTheTruth March 23, 2025

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Six Flags Over Jesus

A really big church.

I go to church at Six Flags Over Jesus.

by SB018 March 16, 2024

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Jesus

King of Jews

Reese: “Oh, you’re Jewish? Wasn’t Jesus like... king of the Jews?”
Reba: “What the-”

by definitiongobrrrrrr December 16, 2020

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Jesus Water Streak

The act of moving over the surface of a body of water naked.

Jen: Matt took me on the most fun date yesterday!
Jennifer: What did you guys to?
Jen: We Jesus Water Streaked down the river!
Jennifer: You did what?
Jen: We rode jet skis naked!

by MikeRoch April 13, 2017

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