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Jared

19 and never learned how to fucking read
Hey Jared can you read number 16 for the class?
No I cannot what up I Jared
by g(y)ay July 18, 2018
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Jared

Someone who looks like a fuckboy and probably was one when he was younger. Acts super tough around his friends but secretly goes to cry in the bathroom when someone says he's stupid. Very unclear with his feelings for people and when he likes a girl he doesn't say it directly.
"Hey so does he like you?"
"I'm not sure, he's being a real Jared"
by CurvyPancake April 19, 2019
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Jared Militar

A jararted person. The only word to describe him is "jararted".
Person 1: How's Jared Militar?
Person 2: He's Jararted
by Discorduser717 October 31, 2019
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Lord Jared

Lord Jared

The ancient Thallasian Knight rumored to wield Excalibur one thousand years before the reign of King Arthur.

A most powerful Warrior in the Dark Ages until a beast of unfathomable proportions got the best of him.

Supposedly shared the same lineage as Arthur himself.
"Excalibur, being the sword of the chosen ones, passes down a single bloodline every one thousand years. From Lord Jared to King Arthur."
by rhodesscholar February 16, 2007
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is jared an idiot

by Me is ben :D March 4, 2017
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jared

a man who makes orgasm noises to the point of turning purple. he lives in online forums and enjoys driving people crazy. he also is usually found 69ing a fake stuffed turtle. also can be used as a verb such as "I just jareded that turtle" and insult. EXTREMELY GAY
youve been spending alot of time on those forums lately, your starting to turn into a jared.
by metallballer February 5, 2008
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Pre-Erin Jared

Jared Meyers before his introduction to Erin Wenger. Characteristics: Hardcore conservative, likely to be seen at NRA meetings, poor dress attire, going to Lane Community College, not an advocator for equal rights between the male and female gender, often uses the term "faggot," active member of The Group. See Post-Erin Jared for comparison.
"Shut up Faggot" - Pre-Jarin
by JNSD March 23, 2005
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