Yes, it's multiple parts this one...
*The wilderness*
Lucifer "Oh what in the fuck is it now!?"
Jesus "Hey man! Long time no see! What's it been? 30 years? I'm a guy now."
Lucifer "This is what you've been doing!? You can't be a guy!"
Jesus "I am. I'm Jesus Christ now."
*The wilderness*
Lucifer "Oh what in the fuck is it now!?"
Jesus "Hey man! Long time no see! What's it been? 30 years? I'm a guy now."
Lucifer "This is what you've been doing!? You can't be a guy!"
Jesus "I am. I'm Jesus Christ now."
Lucifer "JESUS CHRIST!"
Jesus "Yep."
Lucifer "Jesus Christ! This is ridiculous. You can't be a guy. Change back! Change back immediately!"
Jesus "Oho can't I? Are you my dad now? Ok father. I won't be a guy *Father*."
Father "I don't need to be your father to- Wait... *Father* YOU SON OF A BITCH! What are you going to do!? What are THEY going to do!? They are going to fuck your shit up!"
Jesus "Oh I know."
Father 😨
Jesus 🤨
Father "What the fuck is happening right now..."
Jesus "Uuuuummmm I'm a guy now. I did some cool stuff. They're going to kill me. And.. then... I'm... Gonna... I donno... I'll just come back or something. Or not. Or come back for a bit and then go back and then come back later. It's gonna be tight!"
Father "Jesus Christ... That is fucking stupid man. Absolutely dumb. Why would you come here just to let em kill you?"
Jesus "Save me then idiot! Heheheh!"
Lucifer "No. No, I'm not going to save you from- What is there to even save you from?"
Jesus "Exactly. Hey, we're having a party man you should come out! We got... Um... Bread. We're gonna split a bottle of wine between... Well, between the 14 of us I guess. It's gonna be dope."
Father "TSK! Getthefuckouttaherewiththat! No! NO! I'm not going to 'party' and I'm not going to be a part of any of this."
Jesus "Your loss man parties are fun."
Father 😨
Jesus "Alright man I'll see you later." 😌🖐
Father 😨
Jesus "Yep."
Lucifer "Jesus Christ! This is ridiculous. You can't be a guy. Change back! Change back immediately!"
Jesus "Oho can't I? Are you my dad now? Ok father. I won't be a guy *Father*."
Father "I don't need to be your father to- Wait... *Father* YOU SON OF A BITCH! What are you going to do!? What are THEY going to do!? They are going to fuck your shit up!"
Jesus "Oh I know."
Father 😨
Jesus 🤨
Father "What the fuck is happening right now..."
Jesus "Uuuuummmm I'm a guy now. I did some cool stuff. They're going to kill me. And.. then... I'm... Gonna... I donno... I'll just come back or something. Or not. Or come back for a bit and then go back and then come back later. It's gonna be tight!"
Father "Jesus Christ... That is fucking stupid man. Absolutely dumb. Why would you come here just to let em kill you?"
Jesus "Save me then idiot! Heheheh!"
Lucifer "No. No, I'm not going to save you from- What is there to even save you from?"
Jesus "Exactly. Hey, we're having a party man you should come out! We got... Um... Bread. We're gonna split a bottle of wine between... Well, between the 14 of us I guess. It's gonna be dope."
Father "TSK! Getthefuckouttaherewiththat! No! NO! I'm not going to 'party' and I'm not going to be a part of any of this."
Jesus "Your loss man parties are fun."
Father 😨
Jesus "Alright man I'll see you later." 😌🖐
Father 😨
by Hym Iam August 9, 2023
Get the Jesus Christmug. John- Mother of Jesus Christ i can't believe the Patriots are losing to the Raiders
Me- I guess the patriots just suck
Me- I guess the patriots just suck
by Crzyfkr October 9, 2010
Get the Mother of Jesus Christmug. The son of God according to the Christian Faith. He is charitable, kind and loves everyone, even minorities, despite what "Christians" may say. It has been claimed that he died and resurrected, though this has been unproven. Notably, on May 31st 2025, he was reborn as a Furry Femboy identical in appearance to the fictional character Reggie The Rat made by Whygena.
Person 1: THE HELL DO YOU MEAN JESUS GOT REBORN AS A FURRY FEMBOY WHAT THE FUCK
Person 2: I can't tell if this is blasphemy or not due to it being true.
Person 3: this is the funniest shit ever oh my god
Person 2: I can't tell if this is blasphemy or not due to it being true.
Person 3: this is the funniest shit ever oh my god
by Silly Billy, unintelligent June 2, 2025
Get the Jesusmug. When a person, usually in response to pain, emotional or physical, begins a crazed angry yelling to vent their frustration, often going down the list of the curse words they know.
by Leonidas of Alexandria March 5, 2024
Get the Jesus Godamn Fuck Shit Damn Bitch Motherfucker!mug. When someone justifies their frowned-upon, or even illegal, actions by comparing themself to Jesus disobeying the Roman Empire by spread his beliefs. The general idea is that if Jesus was doing the right thing by broke the law in order to spread the word of god, then it is already for them to break the law in order to <insert action here>.
"Sure, its illegal, but did that stop Jesus when the Romans said his mission was illegal???"
*off to the side*
"Holy shit, he pulled the fuckin' Jesus Card!!"
*off to the side*
"Holy shit, he pulled the fuckin' Jesus Card!!"
by Xavien35449510 February 2, 2024
Get the Jesus Cardmug. "Jesus cheated on me again*
by mayay February 4, 2024
Get the Jesusmug.