loaded burglar alarm

A loaded gun that’s close by when someone breaks in to your place.

We never had a need for a brinks security system. Daddy kept the “loaded burglar alarm” under his bed.

by Dick Da Bruiser November 3, 2020

Turd Burglar

When your out walking your dog and your partner picks up your dogs freshly laid faeces.

"Oh look Buddy here comes Fiona the Turd Burglar to rob your shit"

by Aldo83 December 4, 2025

Jerk Burglar

Jerking off in a public bathroom that stinks so bad, you wear a mask on your face to cover the smell

The smell was so bad in the public bathroom, but I just had to have a go at myself.... now I'm a jerk burglar

by Gar Goyle June 27, 2024

Turd burglar

Its an old superstition about A sneaky lil midget bandit theif in the night that climbs in your bathroom window and burgles the turd right out the bowl that more than likely are there because you got shit faced and forgot to flush or your dirty lazy kids left the bowl present for the turd bandit. Because the story goes.... Feed the turd burglar once a week and you will never get a stomach. Keep that gut flora happy ... Feed the turd burglars.

"Tiny tim dont flush that shit you know you got to leave that for the turd burglar tonight or you will end up with a belly ache

by Ghostbuster2000 February 8, 2021

A windy burglar

A windy burglar is a person who goes out in the rain and windy weather looking for some where to break in the to and is obviously A windy burglar

“Look at her out in this wind he’s A windy burglar”

by Stayout March 12, 2019

Turd burglar

An individual who has the annoying habit of making a scene outside the stall while you’re trying pop a deuce in order to get you to hurry up. Turd Burglars show up typical when you’re in public bathroom in a busy location and someone very impatient shows up and decides to interrupt your shitting session.

>You: answering nature’s call in a public bathroom like a normal person

> Turd burglar: “ Hurry up mister I need to go, I NEED TO GO!!!” X 50 on loop until you finish pushing your slimy turd

by Thicke Henry Richard September 8, 2020

Turd Burglar

When you Dog eats the Cat shit out of the litterbox

Turd Burglar example:

My Dog ate the cat shit out of the litterbox after refusing to eat the food I made, which included the fucking $7 frozen salmon burger I cooked on the stove to mix in with the super expensive Dog food I bought from the specialty pet store! Turd Burgler!

by 1a4Chuck December 1, 2025