Inverse Call Law: the chances of talking to the person you need to talk to are inversely proportional to the number of people actually on the call.
The meeting with AT&T never accomplished anything because of the Inverse Call Law: 15 middle-managers in the call and 0 engineers
by anonymous July 30, 2024
Get the inverse call lawmug. 
Get the step-great-grandchild-in-lawmug. When a person under the conquest of subpar vagina starts putting the (female) over their own friends and make certain rules not to make her (female) angry.
by RacismDoctor May 20, 2023
Get the Simp Lawmug. 1. A list of commandments brought down from the mountain by comedian Adam Carolla governing correct procedure in the preparation and presentation of all known edibles. He didn't speak to God. No, he had a bad omelette at a Big Bear Lake Ski Resort once. Cheese just draped over the cooked omelette, not even cheddar like he ordered, but Swiss. What is he an animal? He was certainly animalistic in his rage, with nearby large-breasted patrons trying to assure him that cheddar is sometimes white like Swiss cheese. Alas, he was not calmed. But rather than complete his transformation into a feral beast, one last "Hail Mary" neuron fired in his brain that reminded him of what it was to be human. Laws. A code to prevent civilization from collapsing. His revelation to apply rules, standards, and norms to food preparation/presentation changed the fabric of our society from that day forward. Never again would anyone have to endure such inhumane conditions in their culinary experience. Hero.
2. Actor Jude Law's fat, balding, less successful dimwit of a brother. (Coined by Adam Carolla on September 25, 2018 on "The Adam Carolla Show")
2. Actor Jude Law's fat, balding, less successful dimwit of a brother. (Coined by Adam Carolla on September 25, 2018 on "The Adam Carolla Show")
STEWARDESS:
Welcome back to first class of High-Falutin Air, Mr. Carolla. When we get up in the air in about 45 minutes, I'll gladly serve you alcohol for the 3 minutes before we begin our descent. We’ll also be serving meals in that window. Since you're in seat 1A, there's a good chance you'll get some.
ADAM CAROLLA:
Oh yeah? What've you got? Don't tell me it's that pomegranate, thyme and goat-cheese pizza. I've blown hobos that sleep on my studio stoop that taste better.
S:
Oh no, Mr. Carolla, we stopped serving that when our surveys indicated customers found it to taste like...well...like you said, "the ejaculate of an AIDS-ridden Homeless man." Now we're serving lentil chili and...
A.C.:
Don't bother. I'll drink my lunch. Until Food Law is enforced in American airspace.
S:
Food Law? Wasn't he in "The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus"?
A.C.:
No, that's his younger, more attractive brother. Food Law was in "The Untalented Mr. Shitley" and "I Fart Fuckabees."
S:
Oh, I see. Anyway, want me to give you your usual road head in the John when we get in the air? After I give you your drink, of course. I know you're a raging alcoholic.
JERRY SEINFELD(row behind)
Why do they call it road head, we're gonna be 35,000 feet in the air?
A.C.:
Pipe down Jerry...unless you wanna buy my Porsche 935. I'm really taking a bath on that one. Turns out no one remembers who the hell Paul Newman is.
S:
Oh you took a bath? Maybe my mouth won't taste like a bum's buttermilk for 3 days.
Welcome back to first class of High-Falutin Air, Mr. Carolla. When we get up in the air in about 45 minutes, I'll gladly serve you alcohol for the 3 minutes before we begin our descent. We’ll also be serving meals in that window. Since you're in seat 1A, there's a good chance you'll get some.
ADAM CAROLLA:
Oh yeah? What've you got? Don't tell me it's that pomegranate, thyme and goat-cheese pizza. I've blown hobos that sleep on my studio stoop that taste better.
S:
Oh no, Mr. Carolla, we stopped serving that when our surveys indicated customers found it to taste like...well...like you said, "the ejaculate of an AIDS-ridden Homeless man." Now we're serving lentil chili and...
A.C.:
Don't bother. I'll drink my lunch. Until Food Law is enforced in American airspace.
S:
Food Law? Wasn't he in "The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus"?
A.C.:
No, that's his younger, more attractive brother. Food Law was in "The Untalented Mr. Shitley" and "I Fart Fuckabees."
S:
Oh, I see. Anyway, want me to give you your usual road head in the John when we get in the air? After I give you your drink, of course. I know you're a raging alcoholic.
JERRY SEINFELD(row behind)
Why do they call it road head, we're gonna be 35,000 feet in the air?
A.C.:
Pipe down Jerry...unless you wanna buy my Porsche 935. I'm really taking a bath on that one. Turns out no one remembers who the hell Paul Newman is.
S:
Oh you took a bath? Maybe my mouth won't taste like a bum's buttermilk for 3 days.
by griffin_t_a September 25, 2018
Get the Food Lawmug. It's like..uh,well.
*massive inhale*
Robbery
image of Burglary
www.sqattorneys.com
Burglary
image of Arson
en.wikipedia.org
Arson
image of Kidnapping
www.thoughtco.com
Kidnapping
Homicide
image of Theft
www.rossalbers.com
Theft
Corporal Injury
Embezzlement
Illegal drug trade
image of Bribery
kecgroup.com.my
Bribery
image of Money laundering
en.wikipedia.org
Money laundering
Terrorism
Extortion
Perjury
image of Forgery
en.wikipedia.org
Forgery
image of Driving under the influence
en.wikipedia.org
Driving under the influence
Manslaughter
image of Conspiracy
www.youtube.com
Conspiracy
image of Identity theft
www.debt.org
Identity theft
image of False imprisonment
www.grievelaw.com
False imprisonment
image of Treason
www.npr.org
Treason
image of Shoplifting
en.wikipedia.org
Shoplifting
image of Violent crime
ucr.fbi.gov
Violent crime
image of Possession of stolen goods
en.wikipedia.org
Possession of stolen goods
*massive inhale*
Robbery
image of Burglary
www.sqattorneys.com
Burglary
image of Arson
en.wikipedia.org
Arson
image of Kidnapping
www.thoughtco.com
Kidnapping
Homicide
image of Theft
www.rossalbers.com
Theft
Corporal Injury
Embezzlement
Illegal drug trade
image of Bribery
kecgroup.com.my
Bribery
image of Money laundering
en.wikipedia.org
Money laundering
Terrorism
Extortion
Perjury
image of Forgery
en.wikipedia.org
Forgery
image of Driving under the influence
en.wikipedia.org
Driving under the influence
Manslaughter
image of Conspiracy
www.youtube.com
Conspiracy
image of Identity theft
www.debt.org
Identity theft
image of False imprisonment
www.grievelaw.com
False imprisonment
image of Treason
www.npr.org
Treason
image of Shoplifting
en.wikipedia.org
Shoplifting
image of Violent crime
ucr.fbi.gov
Violent crime
image of Possession of stolen goods
en.wikipedia.org
Possession of stolen goods
by The Creator Of The Universe December 18, 2022
Get the Law Listmug. by Gravrok February 23, 2021
Get the International law of yoinkmug. A large highball glass with one
Large ice cube and at least four fingers of your favorite liquor, usually consumed in multiples of 2.-
Large ice cube and at least four fingers of your favorite liquor, usually consumed in multiples of 2.-
Mother in Law Cocktail: “Got to grab a handle of vodka so I can have a couple
Mother in-laws when I get home so I can have dinner with
My mother in law who lives in my
Basement”
Mother in-laws when I get home so I can have dinner with
My mother in law who lives in my
Basement”
by schnock123 October 3, 2018
Get the Mother in Law Cocktailmug.