Mid-Jerk

A scenario when, as you're in the process of masturbating to porn, your friend texts you and the text pops up at the top of your viewing screen blocking some of the action.

Jerry: (Masturbating to porn)

Friend texts: yo could I borrow your notes from class? I was absent today.

Jerry: Dude you caught me mid-jerk.

by serd12 June 18, 2018

pretentious jerk

a contemptibly obnoxious person who attempts to impress others by acting of greater importance, talent, culture, etc., than he/she is actually possesses.

I don't appreciate how much you are being a pretentious jerk at dinner with my family.

My boss is such a pretentious jerk!

by Matt01 February 5, 2019

cave jerk

when one masturbates with his/her arm under one leg whilst making caveman noises

*knock knock*
"What's all that strange grunting?"

"wtf?!? I'm cave jerking in here!"

by ohmschode January 12, 2009

Jerk o'lantern

A pumpkin that is used as a sex toy. It has a large hole on the top (similar to a normal jack o'lantern), as well as a smaller hole carved into the side, just wide enough to put your dick through. Then someone can stick their hand through the top of the pumpkin and jerk you off.

Benny: I haven’t had sex in almost a week, this is so annoying!
Jeff: Huh? Aren’t you still dating Ellie?
Benny: She's on her period right now. Yesterday I made a jerk o'lantern and Ellie gave me a handjob in it. How sad is that?

by AP Everything October 22, 2019

jerk around

to hassle someone; to waste someone's time. .

Stop jerking me around and give me my money back. They sure like to jerk around people in that music shop.

by HichemFerdes December 17, 2016

Surf and jerk

A surf and jerk is when you get a handjob while eating seafood.

Hey remember Brenda from last night, well she gave the best surf and jerk ever .

by Teejay21 March 14, 2017

jerking a turd

Jerk•ing•a•turd jerk-in-uh-turd

-adjective
1. Speculative term used to refer to someone's tardiness or absence.

2. late; absent; missing.

Question: "Where's the groom?"
Answer: "I don't know. He’s probably jerking a turd."

The ceremony starts at 3:00 PM sharp. You better be there - don’t be jerkin’ a turd.

by CongratulationsDave&Chrissy! August 29, 2010