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John

This abomination of a being can destroy the universe by using 0.1 percent of his power. He usually hides his fat in his disposable miniature pocket universes that he has in his magic pockets , but there have been incidents in other dimensions where the parallel John (which is not as powerful as the John in this universe) destroyed 1 billion other dimensions which teared a hole in the multiverse by accidentally letting out 10 percent of his power.

Below is rare footage of John using 0.000000000000000000000000000000001 percent of his power
Eminem: something’s wrong, I can feel it
Eminem:if this is what I think it is, we’re in big trouble

John: LAUGHS IN JOHN
by Joguan 69420 November 14, 2019
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John

The literal definition of a walking dick. And also, probably a walking std. Don't date a John unless you want to get cheated on.
'He cheated on you?, He must of been a John"
by rocky bob August 15, 2018
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John

Fucking stupid cunt who will eat your left over Little Cesar’s cheese pizza you were saving in the fridge
Me: Bro have you seen my pizza?
John: oh yeah I ate it
Me: .....
by Me, I’m him October 8, 2019
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John

A nice guy. He will always stick up for you when you're sad or happy! He's hardworking and has lots of friends. John has short black hair, in a cool way.
Guy 1: Wow John isn't even going to have a snack break??
Guy 2: Yup, that's John a very hardworking guy.
by Annoying Josh May 28, 2019
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John

a perfect name for a puppy !

( according to a tweet by Louis William Tomlinson )
Louis, look ! I got a puppy !!
- What did you name it ?
John of course ! :D
by strawberrykat April 30, 2021
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john

Something you are referring to as an object .
by v r o December 15, 2017
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John

But of a twat innit
Mate that John over that is a bit of a twat innit
by John Lenon2234 May 5, 2018
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