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Cosmic Blasted

When you are turbo gonked on quality gas
Person 1: Yo steve!
Person 5: steve can’t answer you, he’s cosmic blasted
Steve:
by dinkystinker January 28, 2023
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Cosmic

When all around you is going to shit but you're too blind or stupid to see it so you say it's all cosmic.
When your staff are so bad that just turning up on time is an improvement. That's for being on time. You're cosmic.
by Jojnny5 December 28, 2023
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Cosmic Piñata

An entity/person/thing that is responsible for actively or passively absorbing bad events (or, taking the 'hit') so that good things can happen to others, or so that others can avoid bad things.

When it happens passively, the Universe is picking on you.
When it happens actively, the unfortunate person is fixing their karma.
Example 1:
Guy 1: Hey, I heard Steve got struck by lightening thirteen times yesterday!
Guy 2: Yeah totally. I was standing right next to him. If he didn't take it all I would have gotten struck too!
Guy 1: Oh God, yeah, Steve must be a cosmic piñata. Last time I was almost hit by a car but Steve appeared out of nowhere-the car swerved and hit Steve instead!... We're lucky he was with us when shit happened!

Example 2:
Guy 1 does 20 gacha pulls in a mobile game and get rubbish. Guy 1 is a conmic Piñata because he unwittingly raised the chance for another player to get something good.
Guy 2 does 1 gacha pull and get 10 x 5* characters. Guy 2 got lucky because Guy 1 absorbed all the trash.

Example 3:
Girl 1: Hey look! a Louis Vuitton for only 50 bucks on this website!!
Girl 2: *pulls out credit card and buys 10* - OMG! I NEED!

Girl 2: *Finds out it was fake and the thieves stole her credit card details and maxed it out. She didn't have theft insurance.* - Shit!

Girl 1: Oh God! Lucky you found out or it would have been me who would have been conned!
by TaoistCat October 4, 2020
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Cosmic Douma

the most retarded kid the world has ever seen
Cosmic Douma likes to rape kids
by sneakay :3 April 30, 2023
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Cosmic douma

A small kid who is very sexy

He love to fuck minors and is a nazi general he is very hot and make people's cunt painful he is the brother of acta and enemy of gay beats
by Gaysndhcywf3 3D April 17, 2023
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Cosmic Kayla

When you cancel plans three times in a row and then kill yourself
Dude, I'm sad and don't wanna go see my friends. I might Cosmic Kayla myself.
by AveDaddy March 2, 2024
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Cosmic Rust

The transformer's version of Thanos's snap
OK weak protoforms don't bother sentinel or he will use his cosmic rust gun on you,you all know what happened to ironhide.Don't mess with him or you will die like jetfire said:falling to pieces
by Anonymous bounty hunter August 4, 2021
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