Kinky Jesus

A sexual position where the woman goes up against the wall, with her arms out horizontally like Jesus. The man is in front of her with his hands clasped in hers, humping her very fast and sweaty.

Also, if you're into this sort of thing, it can be done with two guys but they both face the same direction.

My girlfriend was begging me to give her a kinky jesus.

Kinky Jesus by Alex and the Delawana crew October 2, 2007

The Jesus Bump 

Noun

1. Euphemism for awkward Christian sex.

2. Christian dry humping

3. Mormon anal sex

4. A dance move done by Christians in which they spread their arms out to the side to look like Jesus on the cross. Then with feet together hop to the beat of music with knees barely bending. Palms facing forward.

Verb

-ed, ing

The act of doing any of the above

Dude, that Mormon girl; she's totally down for the Jesus Bump.

Yea, man, she was so uptight. But she let me Jesus Bump that.

Man, that Baptist girl was a freak. We did the Jesus bump and soaking.

The Jesus Bump by Undercommons September 3, 2014

seeing Jesus in the toast 

to see a pattern of something that is not really there or not formed by your believed cause.

Alex is really seeing Jesus in the toast when he claims that the Illuminati are communicating through magazine covers.

seeing Jesus in the toast by Citation Puffin January 10, 2015

Aqua Jesus 

Aqua Jesus is the Mormon Jesus who has only water in his veins because their sacrament uses water instead of wine to represent his blood.

The Mormon missionary told me to "Let Aqua Jesus in to my life"

Aqua Jesus by jackmormonpriest June 5, 2016

Black Jesus 

No one less than Tupac.

In times of war we need somebody raw, rally the troops
like a Saint that we can trust to help to carry us through
Black Jesus Tupac

Black Jesus by FexilThaDon December 28, 2016

blasian jesus 

Black Asian that is very kind but is very dirty

You are a Blasian Jesus

blasian jesus by Annoying 101 March 29, 2017

spicy jesus

when you are the only asshole in Mario party that has any coins or usually achieved by lying, cheating, stealing and griefing

Michael got a spicy jesus again after using the boo to steal Kevin's last few coins

spicy jesus by 1zaheer1 April 19, 2018