João De Jesus is the most amazing person you'll ever meet, when he comes into your life he will be ur highest point and only take you higher. He has a 11 incher and going strong, He's caring and the sweetestperson you'll ever meet, curious about the world and all the cultures and histories and fucken smexxxxy in a hoodie. Has multiple pink florida shorts and even though he acts gay and retared he isn't ( the game part), he loles to work on himslef and fet better and gives back to the community, may or may not be racists, he comforts well and is understanding
He has a beautiful soul and a beautiful at of seeing life and will open u up so many new experiences, he will be the best thing that will ever happen to you.
He has a beautiful soul and a beautiful at of seeing life and will open u up so many new experiences, he will be the best thing that will ever happen to you.
Jack : " if João De Jesus was gay id hit that"
Bob : " nah he's just a little dyslexic, but he's the best person you'll ever know"
Bob : " nah he's just a little dyslexic, but he's the best person you'll ever know"
by He's my world March 27, 2024
Get the João De Jesusmug. by Peeha Auntie November 25, 2019
Get the mother jesusmug. Jesus is Lord. He loves you so much that he died for your sins, a painful, brutal death. He didn’t want to, but he didn’t want you to have to suffer what he did. He chose YOU. He chose LOVE.
He rose again and lives in our hearts. Now you don’t have to bear the pain that he did. He knew that you would curse him,mock him and sin against him. Regardless, that didn’t stop him from giving you a chance at heaven, a chance at a better life where no suffering or tears exist. I can promise you the love you’ve felt on this earth is nothing compared to his.
Tomorrow is not promised so use it wisely. May God guide you and bless you, Amen.💗
He rose again and lives in our hearts. Now you don’t have to bear the pain that he did. He knew that you would curse him,mock him and sin against him. Regardless, that didn’t stop him from giving you a chance at heaven, a chance at a better life where no suffering or tears exist. I can promise you the love you’ve felt on this earth is nothing compared to his.
Tomorrow is not promised so use it wisely. May God guide you and bless you, Amen.💗
by Jesuschristisking December 21, 2024
Get the Jesusmug. by Juliacoolia July 3, 2022
Get the armani de jesusmug. nickname or the act of driving so recklessly that only the Lord Jesus Christ himself can prevent permanent damage and/or death.
bob: « you heard that noise ? »
sue: « no, what was it ? »
bob: « driving jesus got in another accident on the avenue »
sue: « no, what was it ? »
bob: « driving jesus got in another accident on the avenue »
by gof August 20, 2024
Get the driving jesusmug. Midwest slang for orange juice containing the drug propylhexedrine aka Benzedrex. The drug can be bought over the counter in the form of a nasal inhaler normally used for allergies. If you break the inhaler and take out the cotton inside and soak it in orange juice or any acidic beverage for 24 hours the active ingredient (propyl) is extracted. Propyl has similar effects to amphetamine and methamphetamine and induces a state of intense focus and euphoria. It is also horrible for your vascular system and causes severe vasoconstriction.
In simple terms you will go sicko mode and probably will end up on meth if you weren’t already when you took the Jesus Juice. It’s called Jesus Juice because it makes you feel like Jesus and it will bring you back from the dead.
In simple terms you will go sicko mode and probably will end up on meth if you weren’t already when you took the Jesus Juice. It’s called Jesus Juice because it makes you feel like Jesus and it will bring you back from the dead.
Me: Hey bro do you want some speed laced orange juice?
Homie: Oh, shit did you put your Vyvanse into OJ?
Me: Nah I ran out like a week ago, this is Jesus Juice! It feels just as good if not better. You can feel your brain cells dying so it must be good.
Homie: Oh, shit did you put your Vyvanse into OJ?
Me: Nah I ran out like a week ago, this is Jesus Juice! It feels just as good if not better. You can feel your brain cells dying so it must be good.
by danasp_42 December 27, 2019
Get the Jesus Juicemug. It appears, that while jesus was making miracles, he was super high on crack. The church is removing every record of him, and replacing it with Danny De Vito
by Sab-E.R November 19, 2018
Get the Jesusmug.