jesus melnchor

A stupid dick sucker.bit loves a girl named a familia most of the time.and has a lot of friend,he is very kind,and is cute/fine

Jesus melnchor can suck your dick you.
K I'll ask him

by It yo girl... December 31, 2017

Southern Jesus tug

When someone (usually from a southern state) is to poor to afford an abortion, so they take a cross and brutally beat the woman’s stomach in the name of the lord until nothing but gork comes out.

Me and sally couldn’t get our baby aborted by professionals, so we had billy do a southern Jesus tug.

by I have a PhD in words January 2, 2018

jesus chrust

1. A misspelling of Jesus Christ
2. A man who died for your crust

"You going to church today?" "Nah, I'm going to chirch." "What's that?" "It's where you can go and worship our lord and savior Jesus Chrust." "Go fuck yourself."

by Communistically-Delicious May 3, 2018

Jesus Jammies

The underwear under the underwear that Mormon women wear

Don't get your Jesus Jammies in a bunch.

by Kass96 March 21, 2017

Jedi Jesus

Luke Skywalker was one of the best and gifted of all Jedi Knights. As the only son, of "The Chosen One", Anakin Skywalker, who became Darth Vader, he was literally the Resurrection and "Second Coming of the Jedi. He was the founder of the New Jedi Order, thus, becoming the first Jedi Grand Master since Yoda. Since he did all of these remarkable things, he is known in the Star Wars geek community as Jedi Jesus.

Rey:"You knew Luke Skywalker?!"

Han Solo: "Yep" Jedi Jesus was a good friend of mine."

by D-Big April 7, 2017

Jesus

The true reason for people to hit the gym and start repping. Every rep you make is a rep for Jesus. Because of the cross that is attached to his body he isn't able to rep anymore. This has caust a significant loss of gains. Every rep will make Jesus a proud boy, after al he was the establisher of fitness. Very old people remember him as the boy who carried a bigass piece of wood to the top of a hill. Later that day Jesus though: "what have i done" but that's an other story.

Because God is a shame of his weak son. He made people think repping is a bad thing, it will make Jesus look bigger if everyone else is a skinnymotherf*cker. So before you start repping, you have to ask for forgiveness for the gains you are about to receive.

Please come in. Welcom in my church, i can see you have done a lot of reps for Jesus.

by Heuswaar April 8, 2017

Jesus Water Streak

The act of moving over the surface of a body of water naked.

Jen: Matt took me on the most fun date yesterday!
Jennifer: What did you guys to?
Jen: We Jesus Water Streaked down the river!
Jennifer: You did what?
Jen: We rode jet skis naked!

by MikeRoch April 13, 2017