a secret sexual act be-known only to the descendants of the French fur trappers who first settled in Canada. It involves a copious amount of males and the rack of a moose, maple syrup, and a silver bowl which has since been modified into the Stanley Cup. Although the action itself is classified those who accomplish the act are free to no longer live in Canada.
A lollipop is to the Wonka Factory as 2 girls 1 cup is to Canada's History.
Wow no more cancer, aids, war, healthcare costs, and Fox News. Really? I wonder who performed Canada's History to make that possible.
Wow no more cancer, aids, war, healthcare costs, and Fox News. Really? I wonder who performed Canada's History to make that possible.
by Lt. Barkey the Dog February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. A sex act so depraved that Stephen Colbert could not describe it on air in his Feb 4, 2010 episode. His only hints were that the act involved moose antlers, a jar of maple syrup, and the Stanley Cup.
The act itself consists of three parts, and therefore requires three people: the first person must don the antlers, and ram into the other two as much as possible, while blind-folded, thus exhibiting the mating behavior of the Canadian moose. The second person is the one in possession of the Stanley Cup, and must apply the syrup to it, so as to lubricate it for the final act. Finally, the third person is either entered through the vagina or the anus with the Stanley Cup.
The act itself consists of three parts, and therefore requires three people: the first person must don the antlers, and ram into the other two as much as possible, while blind-folded, thus exhibiting the mating behavior of the Canadian moose. The second person is the one in possession of the Stanley Cup, and must apply the syrup to it, so as to lubricate it for the final act. Finally, the third person is either entered through the vagina or the anus with the Stanley Cup.
Man, that was one rough night last night. My friends and I tried to recreate Canada's History. I was on the receiving end of the Stanley Cup... I'm still sore...
by schlagsahne February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. While having sex during a hockey match, it's the use of the maple syrup to shove a Stanley Cup like object up a woman's anus, while simultaneously being penetrated in the vagina with a penis which is covered in maple syrup. As soon as the male feels he needs to release he pulls out and cums on top of the Stanley Cup and yells Hat Trick!
Stephen: Hey baby, you wanna go pull off Canada's History?
Stephanie: As long as you can score me a Hat Trick.
Stephen: Don't worry, I can.
Stephanie: As long as you can score me a Hat Trick.
Stephen: Don't worry, I can.
by pickemgenius February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. A sexual act that involves a can of shaving cream, Wayne Gretzky autographed hockey stick, Best of Bryan "Too Cool for an I" Adam's Cassette tape and magic.
This act can only be performed on a female. She must be laying in spread eagle like a maple leaf while her partner rams the Wayne Gretzky hockey stick in her anal cavity while the can of shaving cream in inserted into her vagina with the nozzle sticking outward. While the hockey sticking is thrusting back and forth the shaving is to be spayed up in the air to simulate snow. The Bryan Adam's Cassette tape is to be played in the background.
This act can only be performed on a female. She must be laying in spread eagle like a maple leaf while her partner rams the Wayne Gretzky hockey stick in her anal cavity while the can of shaving cream in inserted into her vagina with the nozzle sticking outward. While the hockey sticking is thrusting back and forth the shaving is to be spayed up in the air to simulate snow. The Bryan Adam's Cassette tape is to be played in the background.
Hey honey, Wayne Gretzky's hockey stick is still up my ass after we went over Canada's History last night.
by nusince February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. An incredibly long, drawn-out sexual act involving a man, a woman, their daughter and son, Grandma (it helps if she's from Quebec), the family collie, moose antlers, maple syrup and a piece of hockey equipment from a former Shawinigan Junior-B player named Red Stanley (aka "Stanley's Cup", sometimes misinterpreted as the trophy from a professional hockey league).
While the act itself is far to complex to explain without the use of diagrams, specially modified crash-test dummies and a pie-chart, it can sometimes be seen performed live on stage at an underground nightclub in Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan by a local theatre troupe known as "The Aristocrats".
While the act itself is far to complex to explain without the use of diagrams, specially modified crash-test dummies and a pie-chart, it can sometimes be seen performed live on stage at an underground nightclub in Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan by a local theatre troupe known as "The Aristocrats".
"Last night's performance of Canada's History was so intense that Grandma's glass-eye wouldn't come back out."
by grapevine1015 February 5, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. Similar to the rumored five-fingered Kung-Fu pimp slap of death, Canada's History is a sexual technique which can alternately lead to either a 36-hour orgasm .... or death.
Instruments used to initiate the illicit 'Canada's History' include a harmonica, a Plastic Man action figure, 2 lbs. of Wendigo fur, a vat of maple syrup, a jar of Nutella, a live duck, 2 packets of duck sauce, the Stanley Cup (full-size replica is allowed), a moose (live or mounted), a kazoo, the complete works of Era Pound, a tazer gun, 4 oz. of tatto ink, a ball gag, and a roll of Canadian quarters. For best results, individuals attempting Canada's History should have endured either a colonoscopy or a pedicure just hours before attempting the procedure.
International treaties prohibit the actual depiction of the technique, although a loophole allows us to provide a list of individuals who may or may not have attempted (and possible even survived) Canada's History:
Betty White
William Shatner
Grape Ape
Lex Luthor
Pres. William McKinley
D. B. Cooper
The black guy from Ghostbusters
Ronald McDonald
Naomi Wolf
Glen Beck
John Luvitz
Redd Foxx
and Rhea Perlman
Instruments used to initiate the illicit 'Canada's History' include a harmonica, a Plastic Man action figure, 2 lbs. of Wendigo fur, a vat of maple syrup, a jar of Nutella, a live duck, 2 packets of duck sauce, the Stanley Cup (full-size replica is allowed), a moose (live or mounted), a kazoo, the complete works of Era Pound, a tazer gun, 4 oz. of tatto ink, a ball gag, and a roll of Canadian quarters. For best results, individuals attempting Canada's History should have endured either a colonoscopy or a pedicure just hours before attempting the procedure.
International treaties prohibit the actual depiction of the technique, although a loophole allows us to provide a list of individuals who may or may not have attempted (and possible even survived) Canada's History:
Betty White
William Shatner
Grape Ape
Lex Luthor
Pres. William McKinley
D. B. Cooper
The black guy from Ghostbusters
Ronald McDonald
Naomi Wolf
Glen Beck
John Luvitz
Redd Foxx
and Rhea Perlman
"Hey, man, are you still getting laid when you go to Niagara Falls for vacation?'
"Well, let's just say Canada's History and leave it at that."
"Well, let's just say Canada's History and leave it at that."
by ScrantonWordMeister February 10, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. 1. The official magazine of Canada's National History Society
2. The history of that country north of the United States
3. A large rodent with a flat tail known for building dams
4. Another word to describe a female human vagina
2. The history of that country north of the United States
3. A large rodent with a flat tail known for building dams
4. Another word to describe a female human vagina
by MIATeddyBear February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug.