cold read

The act of fishing for information, either from a gullible paying customer or from an audience who have just been told to be "open-minded", in which any positive feedback is followed deftly as though coming in "on the astral".

Cold reading:

Hello, I'm getting something ... there is someone who has recently died ... yes, someone has, hasn't they? ... a man, no I didn't think so, either, a woman then, an old woman ... no, dreadful isn't it? ... I'm thinking cancer, no?... a car crash ... yes, and it was tragic, and she was before her time too, would I be correct in saying this? ...

by Fearman March 11, 2008

selective reading

When you have no intention of reading someone's bullshit. So you scan read and only pick out what is relevant to you.

JamsBeam: "I'm going to write a name with my right hand and I'll eat a chip with my left hand"
Me:"are you having a Ketos session Bro?"
JamsBeam:"How does your mind completely erase the word write and replace it with masturbating?"
Me:"it's called selective reading"

by GbAbE September 9, 2018

Reading Eggs

A learning service from Australia primarily used in primary school. (3 - 6)

Teacher: Ok, class, today we'll be doing Reading Eggs!

by QFRSSaddle August 26, 2021

Chopper Read

A true Australian icon and legend. An author, stand over man and intellectual. Cut his own ears off while in prison. A yuppies worst nightmare. Eric Banna portrayed him in the film "Chopper".

"Get them ears off."
"They had to re-stitch his anal webbing."
"Keithy seems to have done himself a mischief."
Chopper Read, Australia salutes you!

by Superbowl Xv April 9, 2018

Drew Read

Drew Read is a very sweet and wonderful guy. He's cute charming and an absolite fucking idiot. He lacks common sense and is very creepy. He stalks girls and follows them to their house. After they get inside he waits until night and sneaks into a tree. He takes out his binoculars and watches them shower. He particularly likes girls with red hair.

"I saw someone follow me home last night!"
"Oh, that was definetly Drew Read."

by DogPoopWeiner December 1, 2021

Good Read

When someone "reads" a situation well.

Johnny I don't think it would be a good idea to throw a rock at that snake

Good read Jim

by BPS14 January 25, 2017

Fart Reading

Commonly used online when someone claims to be a fast reader though they often misread or misunderstanding texts, failing to even see their own misspelling. First became common lingo on 4 chan /pol/.

Anon 1: You misread and turn things into something completely different
Anon 2: I just read fast, nothing wrong with fart reading.

by Marcellus Fredrick Binesworth June 17, 2022