Jesus

Born a virgin birth because that's what Mary said. N**** came out with a phd. Wanted to rule the world. Enough said, they still do that in modern day. He did properly exist though.
Oh Jesus no s***Oh Jesus no s***
by Intheflatfield December 25, 2023
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Jesus

Jesus a guy who buys his “stripper” aka his cousin Gucci shoes and flies her out to Tulum on a couple getaway
Hey did you see Jesus went to tulum
by Bookie602 May 27, 2024
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Jesus

the central figure of the gayest and dumbest man-made religion ever (aka Christianity). he is also the 1/3 of a dumb concept which makes no sense (the Holy Trinity, 3 in 1 shampoo). he gets more recognition than God Himself, his creator (really dumb innit). The most brainwashed people on earth (aka christians) have chosen to worship him, even though Jesus has never told anyone to do so. The only people who follow his teachings correctly are the Muslims.
"Please don't worship Jesus, he's just a prophet, not a god, nor part of a trinity."
by ISLAMisTHEtruth November 09, 2024
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Jesus

Someone who everyone on this site should learn about. He would very much so like if you were to go to church. Thank You 🙏.
Accept Jesus Christ as your lord and savior
by Please Just Go To Church February 02, 2023
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jesus

me, i'm very obviously jesus
Me: Hello
Everyone: Oh my god! It's literally Jesus Christ!
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Jesus

Sexy ass mother fucker I wanna rail so hard him and someone named Moussa were in bed last night
Jesus is super sexy

Moussa: Ikr!

Julissa: wow I’m so mad
by Moussa The moose January 12, 2022
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Jesus

A guy from the bible who people believe died for our sins. Mainly worshipped in Christianity.

Although there are some Christians who are cool with people of color and homosexuals, Homophobic and Racist people commit hate crimes in his name. Namely *cough*republicans*cough*
Republican using Jesus to his benifit:
In the mighty name of Jesus I ban you from this store, and any other f** here!
Jesus says that the covid vaccine is a lie!
Homosexuality is a SIN! THE LORD JESUS SAID SO!

Normal Christian Respecting People:
Remember Jesus loves you honey.
Jesus is with you my dear.
Jesus take the wheel!
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