Personal Jesus 

A slightly lanky, bearded man wearing robes and silly sandals that you keep nailed to two perpendicular planks of timber (forming a 'T' shape) in your backyard.

Cops: "Excuse me sir, who is that destitute man you have unlawfully restrained in your backyard??"

You: "oh dude, its just my own Personal Jesus"

Cops: "Sorry to have bothered you sir"

Personal Jesus by God Johnson May 29, 2010

The Jesus of Dating 

Someone who is so good at dating (Getting hot chicks with no competition, while their friends fool themselves into going after the ugly chicks) they are like Jesus, only in the context of dating. For more information on The Jesus of Dating, see: Rasalom

Wow, look at that guy getting all of those hot girls! He is surely The Jesus of Dating.

The Jesus of Dating by Kelset January 20, 2008

gentle jesus 

when a man inserts a very skinny penis into a fat woman's cunt. she must be sleeping during the process.

i gave that bitch the gentle jesus last night. she must have liked it because she didnt wake up.

gentle jesus by gentle jesus giver. April 3, 2009

sweet italian fucking jesus! 

An exclamation of shock/surprise.

You have your hair cut, coloured and styled in a top salon by a man wearing more make-up than you. He tells you the cost of your new barnet - you gasp, then mutter "'sweet italian fucking jesus!' I won't be coming back here again"

sweet italian fucking jesus! by Laura Wilson November 24, 2005

a jesus 

a guy with long hair

Drill sergeant: "Look, boys, we got a Jesus here! Get his ass in that barber chair!"

a jesus by tcagle October 29, 2007

g-force jesus 

when a religious person drives way to fast and causes their plastic jesus hanging in the rear view mirror to sway back and forth and he therefore gets g's.

wow did you see that nun drive by... she had a g-force jesus.

g-force jesus by whitechokolate April 10, 2008

Its All Jesus 

Its All Jesus: Its all good
Jesus = Good so add Its all in front on it.

Man Its All Jesus.

Its All Jesus by Caly February 16, 2004