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Jetway Jesus

A mythical figure colloquially known in the airline industry believed to miraculously 'heal' passengers who request wheelchairs or any other form of mobility assistance at their point of departure but mysteriously no longer need it upon their arrival. The sudden recovery is often attributed to the miraculous intervention of 'Jetway Jesus'. The term reflects the cynical humor often employed by airline employees due to the perceived misuse of accessibility services by able-bodied passengers.
After helping a passenger in a wheelchair onto the plane, I was surprised to see her walk off unassisted at the destination. Looks like we've had another visit from Jetway Jesus.
by HappyCleaner82 November 21, 2023
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Jesus H. God

A quite humorous variation of “Jesus H. Christ”, most famously used in the 1986 film “Short Circuit”. An apt term for expressing your extreme shock at a sudden turn of events.
Weather reporter: “Folks in the DFW area may not be able to see the April 8th solar eclipse due to cloud coverage.”

Person who invested time and money to travel to Texas specifically for this event: “JESUS H. GOD!”
by Alex-2598 April 4, 2024
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Jesus time

When you declare Jesus time there is no cussing and no shenanigans .
Guy 1: That little mother fuc...
Guy 2: It’s Jesus time.
Guy 1: Ok.
by Hamburgerblobfish May 10, 2019
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maria de jesus

Maria de jesus meaning "Jesus mother" or "mother of Jesus", if you ever meet one she will bring you good luck and fortune, she puts a smile on everyone's face, she is quick to turn heads and to get praised, if you fall in love with one you won't ever stop even if it doesn't work out she will leave an imprint on you forever, she's a kind hearted soul who just wants to be loved deep down inside, don't ever let go of her if you have her because once she's gone she's gone forever.
"maria de jesus has arrived"
"Maria de jesus can you pass that over please?"
by Commonroses August 27, 2022
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Chantel De Jesus: I Tapped You Three Times.

What I call homo-sapiens who are addicted to perianal abscesses.
Person 1: Are you addicted to perianal abscesses?
Person 2: Yes.
Person 1: Chantel De Jesus: I Tapped You Three Times.
by Maternal-Fetal-Medicine February 12, 2025
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jesus h. christ on a tin fucking crutch

a term used to describe something shocking, or so dumfounded and stupid.
Staff sergeant: jesus h. christ on a tin fucking crutch!, carl what the fucking hell have you done?!

specialist Carl: exactly what you told me to do sergeant I burn the shitter.

Staff sergeant: jesus christ, carl do as I mean not as I say!!
by Sparttjbkibweq23SsChief June 15, 2017
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