Cheesman Excuse

An incredibly poor excuse that even the perpetrator knows is so horrendously appalling it's an insult to the intelligence of the listener.

Cheesman (Of Jamie And The Cheesmans): I'm very tired.
Innocent Bystander: It's 1 o' clock in the afternoon.
Cheesman (Of Jamie And The Cheesmans): I have to revise.
Innocent Bystander: You don't go to school. Wait a minute! That wasn't an excuse at all! It was a mere Cheesman Excuse, designed to put me off while you make your escape! Little do you know your days playing the bass are over, for you have been usurped by a superior artist!
Frankie: (Of Frankie and the fat kids) I'm taking this.
Cheesman (Of Jamie And The Cheesmans): Er, okay.

by Dom (Of Jamie And The Cheesmans) September 3, 2008

excuse me miss

A phrase uttered right before penetrating a girl so hard, you tear her perineum

Sam "excuse me miss"
Trisha "what?...AHHHH"

by Wilshire July 3, 2008

Exclusionist

Someone in the LGBT+ community who thinks that someone else's identity is their business

Mark's an exclusionist, he should probably go outside

by little guy police September 1, 2022

Weak Excuse

An attempt to explain your motives, which ends in a horribly epic fail.

"Our country was founded by Christians"- A weak excuse to explain why we should separate separation of church and state.

"I was curious..."- A weak excuse to cover your tracks for knocking a girl up.

by Brian Wolffe January 5, 2009

excusecraft

A subset of corporate communication that involves developing plausible explanations for what went disastrously wrong with a project, usually to avoid responsibility as an outcome of blamestorming.

The client isn't buying that they lost our phone message about the missed deadline -- better start practicing some excusecraft.

by drwende July 8, 2005

excuseapedia

a person who is always making up excuses

Krista Leach is an excuseapedia. She always has a reason for why things aren't done.

by laleach3 August 19, 2011

co-exclusively independent

A state of romantic relationship within which you are exclusively seeing and sexing each other, yet, maintaining enough distance to be independent like a boss.

dude 1: "Is she single?"
dude 2: "No, she's co-exclusively independent with Boris"
dude 1: "So she'd fuck me, right?"
dude 2: "No, she only fucks Boris"

by semitaken June 2, 2013