Whores Funnel* (aka hoes web*)
Definition:
A sneaky but genius marketing move used by online cyber-prostitutes to turn thirsty followers into paying simps.
It starts with spicy but “safe-for-work” thirst traps on apps like TikTok or YouTube, luring in the unsuspecting (and very down bad).
From there, they drop the IG link in the bio, where things get a little more suggestive.
Once the simp is fully locked in, boom—they hit ‘em with the OnlyFans plug. Before they know it, dude’s wallet is on life support, and she’s out here securing the bag.
Definition:
A sneaky but genius marketing move used by online cyber-prostitutes to turn thirsty followers into paying simps.
It starts with spicy but “safe-for-work” thirst traps on apps like TikTok or YouTube, luring in the unsuspecting (and very down bad).
From there, they drop the IG link in the bio, where things get a little more suggestive.
Once the simp is fully locked in, boom—they hit ‘em with the OnlyFans plug. Before they know it, dude’s wallet is on life support, and she’s out here securing the bag.
Dude 1: Bro, I was just tryna watch some harmless TikToks, and now I’m subscribed to three different OnlyFans. What happened?!
Dude 2: My guy, you got caught in a whores funnel. It starts with a thirst trap, then suddenly you’re in her IG DMs, and next thing you know, you’re paying $14.99 a month to see the same pics she posted for free.
Dude 1: I swear, she was just doing fashion hauls on TikTok… now she’s selling “exclusive content” through some VIP link.
Dude 2: My guy, you got tangled in a hoes web. First, it’s “innocent” posts, then BOOM—subscription time.
Dude 2: My guy, you got caught in a whores funnel. It starts with a thirst trap, then suddenly you’re in her IG DMs, and next thing you know, you’re paying $14.99 a month to see the same pics she posted for free.
Dude 1: I swear, she was just doing fashion hauls on TikTok… now she’s selling “exclusive content” through some VIP link.
Dude 2: My guy, you got tangled in a hoes web. First, it’s “innocent” posts, then BOOM—subscription time.
by ramen connoisseur January 30, 2025
A sex act popularized in Minnesota, but was invented a woman named Kate in the state of Virginia. The sex act used to be an inside joke in the old Yahoo Pro Wrestling Chat room, but quickly spread to all the regulars who used to chat in the chat room. A man from Minnesota who used to be a regular in that chat room picked up the sex act and popularized it in that state.
The sex act is where A woman puts a funnel cake up her vagina. Her sex partner then proceeds to eat the funnel cake out of her vagina.
The sex act is where A woman puts a funnel cake up her vagina. Her sex partner then proceeds to eat the funnel cake out of her vagina.
Dude, I just did the Minnesota Funnel Cake with this girl the other day. I heard about the Minnesota Funnel Cake from some guy from South Minneapolis. As soon as I heard about it, I bought a funnel cake and shoved it up this girl's poontang. Then I ate it out of her. She loved it!
by Ollie Churpuzzi November 07, 2016
When your date jerks you off, and you cum into a pan of hot pan of frying oil. The fried cum is served on a plate and dusted with cocaine.
by MaverickAggie April 11, 2023
Another word for asshole.
by Joker Jr December 19, 2022
Online purchasing behavior is not linear, but the classic attribution model wants it to be. Instead, most leads come in via word of mouth that's untrackable. In-person chats, DMs, Slack conversations, podcast mentions, etc.
Because you can't measure those, it's called the dark funnel.
Because you can't measure those, it's called the dark funnel.
by mrB2B April 13, 2022
A man gathers his baby gravy into a receptacle, dries it, grinds it into a powder, keeps it next to his bed.
When engaging in the sex, just before climax, the man would grab a handful of nut powder and blow it into the face of his partner, thus powdering her like a Funnel Cake.
When engaging in the sex, just before climax, the man would grab a handful of nut powder and blow it into the face of his partner, thus powdering her like a Funnel Cake.
by goddammitbonnie April 30, 2022
A metaphorical process that many privileged expats - often from countries like Australia or France- who move to Berlin for the vibes. It describes the predictable trajectory of initial excitement and exploration, often characterized by partying and casual drug use, which escalates over time. Many find themselves burned out after a couple of years, losing their sense of purpose, and ultimately leaving Berlin more confused than when they arrived.
They treat the city as a disposable playground, diving into its nightlife and drug culture with little regard for its actual residents or community. Many of these expats identify as leftists and engage in performative activism but fail to acknowledge their role in contributing to gentrification and other systemic issues.
They treat the city as a disposable playground, diving into its nightlife and drug culture with little regard for its actual residents or community. Many of these expats identify as leftists and engage in performative activism but fail to acknowledge their role in contributing to gentrification and other systemic issues.
They’re totally in the Berlin Funnel—moved here for the vibes, started partying every weekend, and now they don’t even remember why they came.
by Zeggy-Stardust December 28, 2024