hit the turtle on the head

Lowering one’s guard and then striking when least expected.

Robert formed rapport by making himself a clown and then hit the turtle on the head to got the promotion.

by Saravanan599 August 20, 2019

holy yeet turtle

means you yeet a turtle

epic

"HOLY YEET TURTLE"

by ventron500 November 22, 2019

Pettin’ the Turtle

A situation when one takes an incomplete shit, leaving a protruding “turtle head” behind. The shitter then must pet the lodged turtle head approximately 70 times with toilet paper or moist wipes, shitter’s choice of course.

Mary was pettin’ the turtle for a solid hour after the lunch special at Benihana.

by Daddylongdick813 October 30, 2019

Kiss the turtle

Pushing out a turd when receiving a rim job, so your partner gets a mouth full of poo.

Made Emily kiss the turtle last night.

She broke up with you, didn't she?

Yup.

by Shuaman April 21, 2020

Bee and Turtle Effect

Navigating the balance between acting quickly and efficiently in the present while biding your time for your vast long-term goals. Bees and turtles are diametrically different creatures, yet some of the greatest entrepreneurs and leaders borrow traits from both to create massive change.

Elon Musk Used the Power of the Bee and Turtle Effect to Win the Race Back to Space

Marc Benioff used the Bee and Turtle Effect to Create Cloud Computing

That Bee and Turtle Effect allowed Cori to build a killer career

by SaltnSand June 19, 2020

putting the turtle back in its shell

When your taking a shit, but half way through, you suck the shit back up into your asshole

I just got done putting the turtle back in its shell

by Ishitoften December 31, 2020

Scaring The Turtle

A euphemism for anal sex.

I had to tell my wife last night to hurry up on the toilet. If the turtle didn't go for freedom now then I'd be scaring The Turtle back up there later.

by GravediggerJim February 14, 2021