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The Hamper Technique

The evasive position for an organisation who's received a complaint.

The purpose of the hamper technique is to deliberately misinterpret a person's complaint in order to avoid acknowledging that something has gone wrong.

(Often used by companies, councils and government departments / services.)
1. I complained to the bicycle company because after I paid, they sent me a bike without peddles. They emailed straight back to say they were investigating my complaint that I had bought a banana from them and didn't like the taste. Two days later I got an "official" closed complaint letter which explained that they did not sell bananas so it they did not hold any responsibility for the taste of bananas. The Hamper Technique in Effect!

2. I contacted my local hospital for a copy of their complaints procedure after they stitched me back up with a pair of scissors left inside my stomach. Three weeks later, I was sent a summary of my complaint which stated that I'd complained about the number of stitches they used. (The Hamper Technique).
by Davina Los-Defino May 5, 2018
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joseph and the amazing technicolor umbrella

ONE DAY WE WERE LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW AND SAW A TECHNICOLOR UMBRELLA. THEREFORE IT IS JOSEPH AND THE AMAZING TECHNICOLOR UMBRELLA.
by fromyourpickle May 13, 2018
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The Kaya-Technique

A way to decide if a game reviewer actually takes time to play the game/plays the game they are reviewing. Here's an example:

1. Take the game called Shadow of War, it was a pretty famous triple A game but there was a lot of controversy surrounding it because of its microtransactions. Big reviewers that don't really care about gaming and don't review gamers properly (like Jim Sterling and Paragon) said the game was pay to win, even though it wasn't.

2. Find a reviewer you'd like to know if they are legit.

3. Watch their Shadow of War review

4. What did they say about the micro-transactions? In this example, you know that shadow of war isn't pay to win.

5. If they said it is pay to win, they obviously don't actually pay much attention to the game/ they never played the game and just copy and paste mix what other reviewers have said.

This is an easy and quick way to know if a reviewer is legit. It works with any game and any part or controversy surrounding it, the only two rules are:

1. This only works if you have played the game you're using this technique with and know what is wrong and what it is right.

2. The wrong side is the more famous and believed side by the community.
1: Hey, I found this new youtube channel called Jim Sterling, he is fucking amazing at reviewing games.

2: Dude, have you even tried The Kaya-Technique? He said that Battlefront 2 still is pay to win even though they removed microtransactions a while ago.
by mystique777 May 27, 2018
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The Dong technique

The art of the dong. Known only to the most sophisticated of human beings. Of the highest order. Just reading this you question your existence for not knowing this art.
Man 1-Have you heard of The Dong Technique?
Man 2-What’s that?
Man 1-I see...
by TheManOfDong July 21, 2019
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GE Test Technician

Usually the smartest people at PTO, work on multi million dollar jet engines. Run engines while fucking your girl. Most often than not have huge dicks and always in the DMs of your bitch. Doesn't need a union because they don't have to fight for their worth, it is already known. Best job in southern Ohio
"did you see that GE test technician?" Yeah that GE test Technician is sod and has a huge dick.

"Yeah, she left me for a GE test Technician."

"Wow, that GE test Technician made me cum 7 times last night"
by TheGETestTech September 24, 2019
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pre-chernobyl-technics

technical devices so old u can only find them in russias deepest gulags.
"Hey Bro, I found an old Geiger-Müller-counter in the basemen. It looks like pre-chernobyl-technics."
by KruceZX January 21, 2020
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romanian pencil technique

The process of pulling the females pants and (or) leggings and take the end of a pencil where the eraser is and slowly rubbing it on the thigh/vaginal area
“During art class I saw a boy giving the Romanian pencil technique to one of the thots when the teacher wasn't looking!”
by lilqdawwgg February 20, 2020
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