Jacking off and eating popsicles

Being bored without something to do and entertaining oneself with meaningless distractions. Could be used in place of Twiddling thumbs.

"What have you been doing today, man?"

"Not much, just jacking off and eating popsicles."

by DrunkSaylor May 16, 2022

Flag

Get the Jacking off and eating popsicles mug.

Union Jack Off

An annoying, contemptible, or inconsequential person that also happens to be British.

That bloke had a few too many at the pub and punched a lollipop lady in the tit on his stumble home. He’s a real Union Jack Off.

by Patty Winters March 17, 2024

Flag

Get the Union Jack Off mug.

Jack-Off Scratchpot

An experience referred to as "The opposite of winning a Scratch-Off Jackpot" by both members of the llama breeding field and the Japanese, a "Jack-Off Scratchpot" is an interrogation technique in which several armed guards ejaculate into a bowl of Lucky Charms, and the victim is given the option of volunteering information, or being forced to eat the cereal, along with its horrifying broth/sauce.

"Upon arriving at the North Korean prison, Drew found himself being the unfortunate winner of a Jack-Off Scratchpot, after refusing to relinquish information on the US Nuclear program."

by KickDickem April 21, 2017

Flag

Get the Jack-Off Scratchpot mug.