columbus crew

the first and best team in major league soccer

“we are playing the columbus crew next week”
“might as well forfeit”

by mclaza December 1, 2020

columbus crew

the first and best team in major league soccer

“we are playing the columbus crew next week”
“might as well forfeit then”

by mclaza December 1, 2020

Columbus, Ohio

The only approximate equivalent to the deepest level of hell achieved on Earth.

Chicago man #1: "Hey bro im going to COLUMBUS, OHIO"

Chicago man #2: "you dead as hell on foe nem"

by shawtyslikeamelodyinmyhead July 12, 2022

Columbian Musket Loader

The act of packing cocaine into an erect penis.

Sam - "Brittney packed a gram of the finest nuggets right into my dick. Shit hurt but I was drunk as fuck and told her to snort it, too."

Ray - "She pulled the ol' Columbian Musket Loader on ya. Brutal."

by Nesquik Guy February 25, 2023

2nd Column Shopper

When someone shops based on the price alone instead of the actual item they are buying, derived from the fact that most websites, menus and whatnot lists their price on the 2nd column. In other words, either a cheapskate or automatically assuming the most expensive option is best (open to interpretation).

1. "Mary only bought a side of eggs because it was the cheapest option on the menu, and she's still hungry. What a 2nd column shopper."
2. "Mike just got $100K car, but completely ignoring the fact that it has the reliability of a heroin junkie having withdrawal. Gotta love people who only look at the 2nd column!"

by edw007 January 23, 2019

Journalist/Newspaper columnist

Historically; knowledgeable, articulate people upon whom the population relied for informative and accurate news of the day: modern; generally, people who had difficulty achieving a C+ average in their studies. —D.Mar

Journalist/Newspaper columnist of today are now characterized by extreme envy and a capacity for dissembling and dishonesty beyond description. —D.Mar

by Electric Ave April 10, 2020

Columbia

A smallish suburb located roughly halfway between Baltimore, Md and D.C. The median income, as well as the median age of residents (and cost of living) is slowly rising. Best known for its ridiculous literary street names. The example below features actual street names.

The girl from Columbia who lived on Red Keel was jealous of her friend, who lived on Mooseberger Court.

by ZGL March 3, 2005