edw007's definitions

drunktertainment

1. Something entertaining that happened while you're drunk.
2. Something you witnessed a drunk person do that was entertaining.
From Drunk+Entertainment.

1. "Hey guys, want some drunktertainment? Watch me try to jump from that roof to the other on my son's bike!"
2. "The neighborhood alcoholic is trying to jump from his house to another one about 100 feet away. This is gonna be some quality drunktertainment!"

by edw007 October 9, 2023

tit dirt

(n.) A mysterious form of dust that is attracted by sweat on a person with severe Tourette's Syndrome around the abdomen and chest regions of the body.

Son: Dad, is that a Mickey Mouse T-Shirt?
Dad: The fuck you talkin' about?
Son: (Pointing)There's his ears there, his ears, and there's his face!
Dad: That's not Mickey Mouse, that's just TIT DIRT!

by edw007 September 2, 2008

panda eyes

When one punches both eyes of another person and gives the victim 2 black eyes; causing the victim to have a strong facial resemblance of the panda.

I caught my girl cheating on me, so I grabbed sancho and beat the living hell out of him, and finished by knocking him out by punching the spleen, sprinkling birdseed and honey all over him, dragging his naked body onto a crowded street before finishing off his punk arse with a nice set of panda eyes. That'll teach him not to cheat again.

by edw007 October 2, 2007

ufking

Used in the same context as fucking, but slightly less vulgar, yet still bearing the same context instead of "fiddlesticks" or some such other bullshit.

Me: Damn, I have to work Saturday again? This is the 3rd ufking time I've had--

Over-Sensitive Politically-Correct Mormon (interrupting): Hey! Watch what you're saying, there's kids around!

M: I know, hence the ufking, dummy!

OSPCM: No, I meant the "d-a-m-n" part.

by edw007 February 15, 2008

walking blowjob

Someone who is a waste of space, where the load required to conceive them would've been better off swallowed during a blowjob, but that person is unfortunately living and breathing alongside the rest of society instead.

"I can't stand Roxie... She's a spoiled, inconsiderate and judgmental trust fund baby, when if you take away her looks and daddy's money, she's just a walking blowjob with an IQ lower than her shoe size."

"They would be delighted to tell you how suave they were at the drop of a hat/There was three of 'em/One of 'em thought she was a beauty queen/
The other one was a walking blowjob/And then there was a skinny girl"
-Frank Zappa, Jazz Discharge Party Hats (where I got the word from)

by edw007 May 19, 2021

snerious

A more emphasized version of serious, usually used when something is unbelievable; used in the same context as no way.

A: I found a $50 bill on the sidewalk yesterday.
B: Whoa, are you snerious?

by edw007 September 3, 2007

My bad, your fault

When one person makes a mistake, but admits fault while placing the blame and/or responsibility on someone else, mostly to avoid responsibility while often putting the scapegoat in an awkward situation.

Derek: Damn, man. Not only did Alan forgot to tell me that a specifications changed and all the work that I did this week is now useless, he asked me to do mandatory overtime this weekend since apparently it’s his turn to have his daughter, and he threatened to fire me if I told management what really happened.

John: So a "my bad, your fault" situation. What a jackass!

by edw007 June 27, 2022