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Mount Richard

To have someone snort a line of cocaine off of your erect penis, then immediately perform fellatio on that very penis.
It was a great party, she even 'Mount Richard' me in the bathroom. It was the best blow job ever!
by Thatguyji September 29, 2015
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Richard’s Ascot

The end result of a condom break after vigorous thrusting where the residual elastic band remains at the base of the shaft with some excess latex flapping in the breeze.
Oh shit babe, I’m so sorry. The condom broke...but, hey, check out this Richard’s Ascot.”

“Yo dude. She totally thought I was wearing an intact condom but, mid-fuck, I fastened it into a Richard’s Ascot”
by Cleaveandcrack8 January 11, 2021
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Stiff Richard

Short for a hard cock. A stiffy. A hard on. A boner. A stiff Dick.
Let's hit the bar tonight braaaahh. Sorry dude. I'm handing out at home. Rachel wants to visit with stiff Richard and imma hit it good.
by Eaton Holgoode March 29, 2017
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Richard Slap

That bitch susan wouldn't shut up, so I whipped out and richard slapped her
by The CrackDealer/PIMP October 18, 2010
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Richard Laymon

Richard Laymon, Bram Stoker Award winning American author, (1947-2001)

"If you've missed Laymon, you've missed a treat." --Stephen King

Richard Laymon wrote disturbing, slightly sick and perhaps a bit perverted horror stories. He always took his stories a bit darker and further than Stephen King. He was never afraid of going for the gross-out.
Stephen King, Dean Koontz and Bentley Little were all Laymon fans.
Due to trouble with editors (censorship) in the U.S.A., his work is better known in Europe, Australia and the rest of the world, where his work is published in 15 languages.
Luckily for his American fans, many of Laymon's books are being restored to their original uncut form.

"No one writes like Laymon, and you're going to have a good time with anything he writes." --Dean Koontz

"One of horror's rarest talents" -- Publishers Weekly
An International Bestselling Author, Richard Laymon writes awesome horror stories such as "Beast House", "Darkness, Tell Us," and "The Traveling Vampire Show" and "the Woods are Dark."
by Charles_U_Farley October 2, 2010
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Crispy Richard

A Crispy Richard is when a fried chicken leg is stuck up someone's butt-hole and when it is pulled out, the meat is gone and only the bone comes out.
Ben got a bucket of fried chicken and gave his girlfriend a Crispy Richard in his hatchback Accord last night.
by dance-milk January 11, 2009
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Mr Richards

An extremely obese maths teacher with the world largest fat hairy nippons that uncontrollably produce excessive amounts of full fat milk in order to release stress in the upper section of the man-boob and also this milk would somehow defy gravity and tend to splash against his top lip and create a small ripple for all of the class to look at and laugh. He also has an inhuman addiction to using the term 'top set year 10' constantly which in Chinese translates to 'fat over-weight left bollock that sits in a beat-up chair with several board pens inserted into his arse hole in one go while he also sits there pouring a cold pot-noodle into his fat soggy mangina that further leaks of yogurt juice'. Hes also fat...
Mr Richards:Have all of you fags got your equipment?
Student:No you fucking cuntbag ive lost my ruler.
Mr Richards:What a fucking shame you fat cunt, 'your top set year 10'
Student:Fuck
by mrmystery69 August 29, 2016
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