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Spaulding

A nickname that should be applied to anybody whom fits the following set of properties/characteristics:

1.) speech impediment which results in a retarded accent that is a cross between british/jersey/southern/forrest gump.
2.) constantly repeats the words; "OK, but", "but you get what i'm saying?", "you see what i'm saying", "imagine this".
3.) worships the extinct species; woolly mammoth (also claims that his fat father has eaten a woolly mammoth steak, which isn't even possible).
4.) weighs less than 100lbs.
5.) heavily resembles a vampire.
6.) extremely unthreatening/weak
7.) sexually inactive/possibly gay.
8.) major liar.
9.) claims to have the ability to: "beat that ass"
10.) has only enough testosterone to resort to drinking hot chocolate as opposed to drinking a beer or water.

- It must be stated that a Spaulding will make ridiculous claims with absolutely no proof or any substance. Spauldings are typically social outcasts whom bring social neglect on to themselves through constant lies and an annoying accent. -
Coworker: "Hey Spaulding, how's it going?"

Spaudling: "Not bad."

Coworker: "Did you get those power-rangers you wanted for christmas?"

Spaulding: "You see (Coworker), this is why I hate you, because you always start rumors. *Then attacks Coworker with a cardboard box, resulting in said Coworker placing one hand on Spaulding's chest and SLAMMING him into a shelving unit at a grocery store.*

Coworker: "Don't ever hit me again you little fucking piece of shit, or I will kill you motherfucker."

Spaulding: "I'm gonna beat that ass"

Spaulding's eyes fill with tears.

Here is a documented poem written by a filthy hippie who goes by the alias of "Donovan". This is the poem:

Planes, tanks and mammoths
I said you are ignorant
Beat that rump so hard.

60XEL
by Marsie Donovan December 9, 2008
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spaulding

The act of "doggy style" intercourse while jamming ones thumb into the females anal cavity, and clamping lower jaw. Also known as "Grudge Fuck".
I totaly spaulding styled that bitch.
by Tibbitts June 19, 2007
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Hooray for Captain Spaulding

A reference to Groucho Marx in "Animal Crackers". Said when someone who deserves to be insulted is dissed in a very witty way.
Dr Daniel Heimbauch: If marriage is radically redefined as being just a way of affirming private feelings of loving attraction then equality would require allowing people who love dogs to marry dogs and people who love ice cream to marry ice cream!

Jon Stewart: Yes, That's exactly right! You know I realize now that's not a bald head that's a solar panel for a dumbass machine.

Audience member: Hooray for Captain Spaulding!
by Llamas007 November 6, 2012
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Spaulding

A nickname that should be applied to anybody whom fits the following set of properties/characteristic s:

1.) speech impediment which results in a retarded accent that is a cross between british/jersey/southern/f orrest gump.
2.) constantly repeats the words; "OK, but", "but you get what i'm saying?", "you see what i'm saying", "imagine this".
3.) worships the extinct species; woolly mammoth (also claims that his fat father has eaten a woolly mammoth steak, which isn't even possible).
4.) weighs less than 100lbs.
5.) heavily resembles a vampire.
6.) extremely unthreatening/weak
7.) sexually inactive/possibly gay.
8.) major liar.
9.) claims to have the ability to: "beat that ass"
10.) has only enough testosterone to resort to drinking hot chocolate as opposed to drinking a beer or water.

- It must be stated that a Spaulding will make ridiculous claims with absolutely no proof or any substance. Spauldings are typically social outcasts whom bring social neglect on to themselves through constant lies and an annoying accent. -

A Spaulding is weak and resembles a 12 year old girl.
Coworker: "Hey Spaulding, how's it going?"

Spaudling: "Not bad."

Coworker: "Did you get those power-rangers you wanted for christmas?"

Spaulding: "You see (Coworker), this is why I hate you, because you always start rumors. *Then attacks Coworker with a cardboard box, resulting in said Coworker placing one hand on Spaulding's chest and SLAMMING him into a shelving unit at a grocery store.*

Coworker: "Don't ever hit me again you little fucking piece of shit, or I will kill you motherfucker."

Spaulding: "I'm gonna beat that ass"

Spaulding's eyes fill with tears.

Here is a documented poem written by an atheist that describes the original Spaulding. This is the poem:

Planes, tanks and mammoths
I said you are ignorant
Beat that rump so hard.
by Dan Patton December 9, 2008
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Sopalophagus

Snuffalufagus' cousin. Has a nose with the resemblance of a penis. Likes saxamaphones and long walks on the beach. Quite the douche bag.
Baba Ganoush!!!!!!!!!!
Why did sopalophagus die out?
Because you touch yourself at night!
by Baba Ganoush November 27, 2003
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sopaullina

The sweetest and most caring person you'll ever meet. A person who is so beautiful and pretty and can always put a smile on your face.
When I saw Sopaullina in the hallway, I had the biggest smile on my face.
by Genesis978 January 1, 2014
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sopular

steven is sopular, all the girls wanna talk to him
by cool kid mcgee July 16, 2009
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