Performance Amnesia

The ability to instantaneously forget any and/or all memory of strike-outs at bat, missed anniversaries, double-fault serves and the like--before their accumulated effect can have a detrimental impact on real-time performance.

Hey, Ass-Clown--It might feel good at the time, but it's just not cool to smash an innocent tennis racket or throw your bat into the stands...get some performance amnesia or take up stamp collecting.

by YAWA April 13, 2019

performance anxiety

Worries, usually about performing the act of sex or urination, that cause a person to have an inability to properly execute these functions.

"How was your date last night?"
"It was awful!"
"What, no sex?"
"No dude! Jane was so hot, I got performance anxiety. Then she just left."
"Damn, you're a loser, Jon!"

"Hey man! Stop watching me pee! You're giving me performance anxiety"

by I'likea September 28, 2006

Performance Enhancing Poop

Performance Enhancing Poop (PEP) a.k.a. Steroid Poo.

Act of pooping before an athletic event in order to be lighter, faster, and not have to deal with it during the event.

“I’m about to go running, but first, time for a Performance Enhancing Poop."

by B-Nutty April 13, 2010

P.E.T.'s (Performance Enhanced Titties)

When a female surgically augments her breasts; improving size and mate-ability. Much like P.E.D.'s (Performance Enhancing Drugs), which have the ability to raise a mediocre minor league baseball player's batting average to that of Barry Bonds (P.E.D. poster child), P.E.T.'s (Performance Enhanced Titties) do the same thing for chicks. You can hear the slow clap in the background --> turning "soft 7's" into "hard 8's".

Hey did you see Jennifer yesterday?

Yeah, from 2 Advil on an ironing board to a dead heat in a zeppelin race.

I'm suspicious of P.E.T.'s (Performance Enhanced Titties).

Suspicious, but thankful.

by IfICanFeelEmThey'reRealsies June 1, 2013

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When you are so goddamn bored that you just type the cookies policy of Urban Dictionary into the search bar.

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by AlownAgainstTheWorld May 25, 2023

Pooformance Anxiety

Anxiety concerning the act of defecation, most often related to pooping in public restrooms.

I was at the game and I waited in line for a stall forever, but when I finally got in there I got pooformance anxiety and I couldn't poop.

by El Don Diguidi September 19, 2009

Faulks Performance

A nutter'ish but none the less highly skilled person who builds very fast Saabs

You need some Faulks Performance on that

Thats been Faulks'ed

by In Awe July 23, 2004