(n): The female counterpart to the "Guido" specimen. Exclusive to North America, these creatures are usually of Italian-American decsent. A Guidette can be recognized by her orange color, similar to that of the common tangerine, and their either very light or very dark hair. Guidettes have an overly sexual demeanor, and will often emit high pitch shreiks to attract mates. A creature of habit, the Guidette will spend an excessive amount of time on her appearance, and will usually prefer to don very light lipstick (often to referred to by experts as 'Semen Lipstick'), brands such as Ed Hardy, BeBe and Juicy Couture. Scientists believe they are very tolerant to chemical exposure, as Guidettes will use 3-4 cannisters of hairspray in one day alone.
Although reproduction has not been studied in this species, the Guidette will usually have anywhere from 100 to 200 sexual partners in her lifetime. However, some specimens were found to have exceeded these numbers by the age of thirty.
Common health problems reported in the species include, but are not limited to, alcoholism, venarial diseases (Most often strains of hepititis and herpes), sagging and wrinkled skin with a leathery texture and brain death.
(Sources:
The U.S. Wildlife and Game Adminstration
The U.S. Center for Disease Control)
Although reproduction has not been studied in this species, the Guidette will usually have anywhere from 100 to 200 sexual partners in her lifetime. However, some specimens were found to have exceeded these numbers by the age of thirty.
Common health problems reported in the species include, but are not limited to, alcoholism, venarial diseases (Most often strains of hepititis and herpes), sagging and wrinkled skin with a leathery texture and brain death.
(Sources:
The U.S. Wildlife and Game Adminstration
The U.S. Center for Disease Control)
by MArie8773 January 2, 2010
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Dude 1: Hey, did you see this week's Smosh episode? It had Charlie the Drunk Guinea Pig!
Charlie the Drunk Guinea Pig: Shut up and get me some booze, ya poof!
Charlie the Drunk Guinea Pig: Shut up and get me some booze, ya poof!
by SneakersGirl July 10, 2010
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guize
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It can be negative or positive When you overachieved an expectations or you did better than expected.
Holly Holm needed to beat Ronda Rousey but she didn't just beat her, she Guiced her by knocking her out
by TheGuicer February 26, 2017
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Nevertheless, a wholly remarkable book.
In fact, it was probably the most remarkable book ever to come out of the great publishing corporations of Ursa Minor- of which no Earthman had ever herd either.
No only is it a wholly remarkable book, it is also a highly successful one- more popular than "Celestial Home Care Omnibus," better selling than "Fifty-three More Things to Do in Zero Gravity," and more controversial than Oolon Colluphid's trilogy of philosophical blockbusters, "Where God Went Wrong," "Some More of God's Greatest Mistakes," and "Who Is This God Person Anyway?"
In many of the more relaxed civilizations on the Outer Eastern Rim of the Galaxy, The "Hitchhiker's Guide" has already supplanted the great "Encyclopedia Galactica" as the standard repository of all knowledge and wisdom, for though it has many omissions and contains much that is apocryphal, or at least widely inaccurate, it scores over the older, more pedestrian work in two important respects.
1. It is slightly cheaper.
2. It has the words DON'T PANIC inscribed in large friendly letters on its cover.
Nevertheless, a wholly remarkable book.
In fact, it was probably the most remarkable book ever to come out of the great publishing corporations of Ursa Minor- of which no Earthman had ever herd either.
No only is it a wholly remarkable book, it is also a highly successful one- more popular than "Celestial Home Care Omnibus," better selling than "Fifty-three More Things to Do in Zero Gravity," and more controversial than Oolon Colluphid's trilogy of philosophical blockbusters, "Where God Went Wrong," "Some More of God's Greatest Mistakes," and "Who Is This God Person Anyway?"
In many of the more relaxed civilizations on the Outer Eastern Rim of the Galaxy, The "Hitchhiker's Guide" has already supplanted the great "Encyclopedia Galactica" as the standard repository of all knowledge and wisdom, for though it has many omissions and contains much that is apocryphal, or at least widely inaccurate, it scores over the older, more pedestrian work in two important respects.
1. It is slightly cheaper.
2. It has the words DON'T PANIC inscribed in large friendly letters on its cover.
by Gorblax May 2, 2005
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