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Top deck

v. to top deck: a house guest who defecates in one's host cistern, rather than, more conventionally, in the toilet, for comic effect.
Tony Blair and his wife Cherie were invited round by the Browns to congratulate Gordon on his appointment as Prime Minister. Cherie was furious because she never liked Gordon and wanted her Tony to stay on another 10 years. She said to herself : “I know, I'll fix 'em with a good smelly top deck after the main course”.
by bromp May 15, 2008
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top deck shandy

The expulsion of "baby gravy" (qv), resulting from agitation withing a portion of chest potatoes.
We went back to her place and she gave me a top deck shandy
by Mark May 2, 2003
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Top Deck

To defecate into the cistern of a toilet
"I just top decked my stepfather's toilet"
by skegger March 26, 2005
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Top deck

Verb meaning to lift the lid off a toilet cistern and subsequently crap inside. Your shit will go undetected for months, except that each time someone flushes the smell will be released. It gets worse with every pull of the chain as the festering turd decomposes. Try top decking your enemies - it's the gift that keeps on giving.
I hate that jerk! Next time I'm round his house I'm gonna top deck his m*therf*ckin' toilet
by AnthonyH October 19, 2012
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Top Deck

Bringing A girl home and having both you and your flatmate have a go. There are further requirements to be classed topdeck;

1.1-Both resedents must be on the top story
1.2-Residents are classfied as a top deck crew (one white one brown)
1.3-The deed must be shared roughly at a 50 50 ratio (performance dependant)

If all these criteria are met you have sucessfully top decked someone. ANd if you were on the other end of the stick(s) you have been top decked.

*Top deck came from cadbury chocolate, half milk half white.
Me and clements just top decked this chick in the weekend, what did you do?
by MrRhodes August 19, 2011
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top deck

To have a wank while taking a crap. Originates from the Cadbury chocolate bar of the same name which is half white choc and half brown.
"I'll be out in a minute, I'm just having a quick top deck!"
by willyjoejack October 16, 2006
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Top deck donkey punch

When doing a male or female in the ass you then pull out, cum on your fist, turn your lover around and punch them in the mouth.
I bought an ugly girl home last night and had to resort to a top deck donkey punch.
by Pony girl September 22, 2012
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