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reading the bible

When people only read one part of a larger text, and completely miss the point. This happens a lot in many contexts. Some people even use parts of bible passages to do things that aren't actually good if they were to read the complete passage.
You've completely misunderstood my letter because you didn't read the whole thing through! You're reading the bible!
by Grau December 25, 2008
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Reading The Blurb

Most people look at the back of a book and read the blurb to get an idea of whether they want to read the whole thing.

The act of checking out a chick's booty, or 'reading the blurb', is a very similar concept. Of course 'the blurb' isn't everything, but for some, it tells them all they need to know.
"Damn did you read the blurb on that chick?! I would love to flick through her pages!"

"Have you read many books recently dude? Nah man, I've been reading the blurb a lot though, trying to find the right one for me you know"
by King Of The Blurbs October 18, 2011
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reading the bible

Is a code word for sex. I made it up in high school, so people that didn't know what it was still thought we were good kids
by wildcat February 8, 2005
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Reading the Newspaper

Reading the newspaper is the act of jacking off, beating the meat, choking the chicken, spanking the monkey, buffing the banana, wanking off, pocket pool, pleasure yourself, or just plain old masturbation.
Caitlyn: I don't read the newspaper not three, not four, but fifty-six times daily!

Taylor: Ohh girl, I got choo and I love using anime as an aid to reading the newspaper!

Monica: My mom reads the newspaper, every morning before breakfast..
by t0uchmiib0dy August 2, 2008
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reading the tea leaves

The ability to tell the future from the examination of pubic hair deposited while " stirring the teabag"
"Mate! I've been reading the tea leaves after you were stirring the teabag. The outlook is dire!"

Or

After Dave was found stirring the teabag, his friends chose to do a reading of the tea leaves. Apparently a tall dark stranger was in his future.
by Ardet Malious November 6, 2017
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The standing reading

When you spend a week on Mongolian, marching powder, and the door is locked on, the shitter perch, her self against a post and release all that backed up semi solid waste
Oh, that poor bastard hasta shit so bad and the doors locked. He’s gonna have to do “the standing reading”
by Carne asodomy June 13, 2023
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Reading the book

referencing to when a girl is on her period.
a code known by many girls.
'coming swimming'
'no, im reading the book'
by Lilmo Hatster May 1, 2010
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