by vaginabob January 12, 2015
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by SOMEOTAKU November 3, 2019
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HatFey
• hatley
• hatey
• haffey
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• hatey boner
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• Hatleyball
• Hatley Chair
A game which mixes baseball and soccer. Played by Ben Hatley and his grandkids. The rules are as follows: a game is divided into four fifteen minute quarters called 'Hatleys', a soccer ball is placed on a baseball tee and then hit with a baseball bat, however far the ball goes down the field is either a single, double, or triple. Or if the ball is close enough to the goal it is a grand slam. The ball is then picked up and run into the goal by the scoring player, scoring either 1, 2, 3, or 4 points depending on how far it went. Hatleyball is played all over the world. Ask Ben Hatley, he'd tell you!
Ben: Hey Nelson, you want to play some Hatleyball?
Nelson: Wow! But I don't get it Grandpa Ben. What's Hatleyball?
Ben: Its this game that mixes baseball and soccer. See, I'll show you. You hit the ball off the tee as far down as you want. Then, however far it goes is a single, double, triple, or grand slam. Then you pick up the ball and you run toward the goal with it. If you score the goal, its worth up to four points. (Ben demonstrates how to play)
Liv: Yeah, Nelson, this is fun! You should try it. So, you wanna play? How about you and Coach Patty against me and Grandpa Ben. Two on two!
Nelson: (squeals) Great! But we'll probably be stiff. We'll need some warm up stretches.
Ben: That's easy. Let's all do a Hatley Hula. There you go, ease into it. This is just a warm up stretch.
Liv: Whoah! That ought to limber us up! (blows the coach whistle) Game on!
Patty: Just you wait, Team Hatley! Wolfe and Tokoname are on the hunt! We'll beat you!
Ben: Hatleyball rocks! There's no way you're gonna beat us, Patricia. (like he was mad)
Nelson: Wow! But I don't get it Grandpa Ben. What's Hatleyball?
Ben: Its this game that mixes baseball and soccer. See, I'll show you. You hit the ball off the tee as far down as you want. Then, however far it goes is a single, double, triple, or grand slam. Then you pick up the ball and you run toward the goal with it. If you score the goal, its worth up to four points. (Ben demonstrates how to play)
Liv: Yeah, Nelson, this is fun! You should try it. So, you wanna play? How about you and Coach Patty against me and Grandpa Ben. Two on two!
Nelson: (squeals) Great! But we'll probably be stiff. We'll need some warm up stretches.
Ben: That's easy. Let's all do a Hatley Hula. There you go, ease into it. This is just a warm up stretch.
Liv: Whoah! That ought to limber us up! (blows the coach whistle) Game on!
Patty: Just you wait, Team Hatley! Wolfe and Tokoname are on the hunt! We'll beat you!
Ben: Hatleyball rocks! There's no way you're gonna beat us, Patricia. (like he was mad)
by Dusty's Baby Powder September 25, 2011
Get the Hatleyball mug.Noun. A place where everything is awful and getting worse and everyone has it worse than your privileged ass could ever imagine.
"Oh, you don't want ramen noodles again, princess? They'd be dancing in the streets for one noodle in Hatey!"
"Oh, you live in Haiti? Just be glad you don't live in Hatey, cry-baby, they've really got it bad there!"
"Oh, you live in Haiti? Just be glad you don't live in Hatey, cry-baby, they've really got it bad there!"
by That'snotevenfunny February 15, 2019
Get the Hatey mug.An exercise program created by Ben Hatley. Used as a warm up stretch before he does other things. His wife, Liv, often joins him as do his four grandkids, especially Nick. He often will spend hours doing these, much to Liv's dismay. This is one of the best warm up stretches you can do.
Ben: (groaning) Oh, I threw my back out. I should have done my Hatleystretch.
Liv: No problem. I was about to do my Tai Chi anyway. Want me to help?
Ben: Sure! Once I stretch out, here, I'm hopping on the Benmobile. (Ben and Liv start stretching each other)
Liv: Here, easy there, don't overstretch it, now. You don't want to tear up a muscle.
Ben: Yeah, you're right. Maybe we should just do it easy so that we just warm the muscle. We don't want it to rip.
Nick: What are you two doing? Can I try it, too?
Ben: Sure! Its just our Hatleystretch. Why don't you try it? Granma Liv can help.
Liv: (takes Nick and starts stretching him) Now this is easy. Just do what I do, okay?
Nick: (starts laughing) Wow! This feels great. Have you always done this?
(Ben and Liv both start laughing)
Ben: Yup! We've been doing it for several years. Heck, I invented it! Used to do it when I lugged mail.
Liv: I've done it, too! Helps me with my Tai Chi. (lunges at Nick doing a crane punch)
Nick: Wow! Hatleystretches are nice! I'm gonna have to tell Mommy and Daddy how!
Liv: No problem. I was about to do my Tai Chi anyway. Want me to help?
Ben: Sure! Once I stretch out, here, I'm hopping on the Benmobile. (Ben and Liv start stretching each other)
Liv: Here, easy there, don't overstretch it, now. You don't want to tear up a muscle.
Ben: Yeah, you're right. Maybe we should just do it easy so that we just warm the muscle. We don't want it to rip.
Nick: What are you two doing? Can I try it, too?
Ben: Sure! Its just our Hatleystretch. Why don't you try it? Granma Liv can help.
Liv: (takes Nick and starts stretching him) Now this is easy. Just do what I do, okay?
Nick: (starts laughing) Wow! This feels great. Have you always done this?
(Ben and Liv both start laughing)
Ben: Yup! We've been doing it for several years. Heck, I invented it! Used to do it when I lugged mail.
Liv: I've done it, too! Helps me with my Tai Chi. (lunges at Nick doing a crane punch)
Nick: Wow! Hatleystretches are nice! I'm gonna have to tell Mommy and Daddy how!
by Dusty's Baby Powder June 11, 2011
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by Im not doing a handle tbh mate October 31, 2023
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