cafeteria syndrome

When you spend too much time in the cafeteria. The cafeteria is the only place people see you and you creep them out. Common symptoms are add and craziness.

You see that girl in the caf today?
Ya I never see her out.
Ya. She definitely has cafeteria syndrome.
Shes such a creeper.

by Streaker6969 October 25, 2011

School Cafeteria Kiss

when you wear basketball shorts or other thin bottomwear and sit on the weird ass cafeteria stool things for a while... you get up from the stool and see a little sweat mark left by your nutsack and/or ass, which quickly fades

dude, I was getting up to throw away my shitty ass school lunch and i noticed i made a HUGE School Cafeteria Kiss on the stool thing

by Punchy_207 September 9, 2022

cafeteria Jew

A Jew who picks and chooses which laws in Judaism to follow.

Rachel: Wait, so you won't eat any pork but you'll drive on Saturdays?!
Jacob: What can I say, I'm just a cafeteria Jew!

by Jewmania June 28, 2010

cafeteria

A room or building often located on a school campus which proports to offer comestibles to the masses. However, one most often finds that the fare available in cafeterias does not truly resemble any known food substances. In fact, upon further investigation most knowlegable people flee in horror and disgust from the so-called meals. Others, be they gluttons for punishment (both literal and figurative) or simply starved past the point of reason, choose to ignore the warnings that their senses of sight, smell, touch, and taste are screaming at them, and foolishly proceed to shovel the not-quite deadly toxins into their bodies. For these unlucky individuals a cafeteria can provide them with just enough energy to survive for a few more hours.

I strapped for cash today so I'll have to eat at the cafeteria.

The cafeteria will be serving leftovers today.

by a bibliophile July 14, 2006

cafeteria catholic

A Catholic individual, typically poorly catechised, from the Latin Rite or other. Said Catholic will pick and choose what he chooses to believe in in regards to the faith. Typically they will deny or mutilate revealed truths in order to justify their sinful lifestyles.

John is a cafeteria Catholic, he believes in the Magesterium but he thinks women should be allowed to be ordained.

by Cliff Whitty July 9, 2006

Cafeteria Girlfriend/Boyfriend

An individual that you have a crush on and you creep on in the cafeteria. The Cafeteria Girlfriend/Boyfriend cannot know that you're crushing on them.

Damn my cafeteria girlfriend/boyfriend is looking good at the salad bar today!

by Cafeteria October 24, 2008

Cafeteria Man

An asshole who is obsessed with his worthless job. Yells at poor innocent children and accuses someone of stealing every five minutes. Probably wears a sweatervest and lives with his mom.

"Did you steal those fries?"

"Back of cafeteria man, and get a real job, you're practically 50"

by justanotheryouth December 11, 2009